Hi XXX I hope everything is well with you. Yesterday as well as this afternoon I was planning to mow the back lawn and I noticed that one of the dogs was running around. I don't want to risk any accident - would you mind telling her to stay away from our yard?
50岁白男
The dog was in your yard?
19岁ABC
Yes, she was there around half an hour ago. I am planning to mow the lawn now, if you could have her stay away I would appreciate it. 50岁白男
Interesting, as I have had her in house since 510 pm. Must have been another dog. Our dogs get an electric shock if they come within 10 feet of border
ABC
We went outside a few minutes ago but unfortunately it was already raining. One of the dogs ran into the yard. If this isn’t one of yours please let me know as I am very concerned about unknown dogs in our yard. 十分钟没有回答，ABC发出照片
Attached are more videos of the dog running into our yard. ABC儿子对朋友说，如果邻居半小时不回邮件，就打animal control的电话。 50岁白男
Yes, in good neighborhoods it is very common for dogs to occasionally get loose. The battery on Gertie’s collar failed, and she passed the boundary. The battery has been replaced.
Both dogs are now contained, and should be for the foreseeable future. In next month when you attend to your landscaping you should be just fine. Feel free to safely mow your entire lawn
19岁ABC和朋友为了不把邻里关系弄僵，儿子回邮写到
Thanks, XXX，Have a nice day. 这件事处理完之后，朋友对她儿子说：记住，这世界并不美好，好男儿一生都必须为自已而战！ 叙述完了，你们可以任意评论50岁IT白男和ABC的行为和处理方式，你们也可以根据此事展开联想，评论美国文化和中国文化在处理冲突时表现出的人性的差异！
这是朋友家发生的真实故事。她发在微信里，经过她同意，我转诉一下。疫情刚开始lock-down时，朋友家担心疫情，没有让landscaper 公司剪草，他们家的草暂时由19岁的ABC儿子剪草，第一天出去剪草时，邻居家的大狗（是一种比较凶的狗）咆哮着冲进我朋友家院子（双方院子都1 acre以上）她家儿子回家给邻居家打电话，没人接，再出去时，狗又疯狂冲进她家院子，朋友和她儿子想，邻居也许不在家，明天再剪草吧！第二天下午，朋友的ABC儿子推着剪草机出去时，那大狗又气势汹汹冲进她家院子，朋友赶紧拿着树棍出去，狗退回去，从院子里看过去，厨房里有人，邻居在家，朋友和儿子站在院子里，喊邻居的名字，没人回答，他们回家拿手机，如果狗再冲进院子，录像留下证据。当他们拿着棍子（大狗，怕被咬到）还沒到院子，那狗又狂吠着飞奔到朋友家院子，朋友立刻录像。朋友有一点生气，明明主人在家，却不管自已的狗，要把录像邮件寄给邻居，她儿子不同意，告诉朋友，你不能让对方知道你手里有什么，应该先看看他们怎么说，朋友对儿子说：那你处理。下面是处理的整过过程。
19岁ABC
Hi XXX
I hope everything is well with you. Yesterday as well as this afternoon I was planning to mow the back lawn and I noticed that one of the dogs was running around. I don't want to risk any accident - would you mind telling her to stay away from our yard?
50岁白男
The dog was in your yard?
19岁ABC
Yes, she was there around half an hour ago. I am planning to mow the lawn now, if you could have her stay away I would appreciate it.
50岁白男
Interesting, as I have had her in house since 510 pm. Must have been another dog. Our dogs get an electric shock if they come within 10 feet of border
ABC
We went outside a few minutes ago but unfortunately it was already raining. One of the dogs ran into the yard. If this isn’t one of yours please let me know as I am very concerned about unknown dogs in our yard.
十分钟没有回答，ABC发出照片
Attached are more videos of the dog running into our yard.
ABC儿子对朋友说，如果邻居半小时不回邮件，就打animal control的电话。
50岁白男
Yes, in good neighborhoods it is very common for dogs to occasionally get loose. The battery on Gertie’s collar failed, and she passed the boundary. The battery has been replaced.
Both dogs are now contained, and should be for the foreseeable future. In next month when you attend to your landscaping you should be just fine. Feel free to safely mow your entire lawn
19岁ABC和朋友为了不把邻里关系弄僵，儿子回邮写到
Thanks, XXX，Have a nice day.
这件事处理完之后，朋友对她儿子说：记住，这世界并不美好，好男儿一生都必须为自已而战！
叙述完了，你们可以任意评论50岁IT白男和ABC的行为和处理方式，你们也可以根据此事展开联想，评论美国文化和中国文化在处理冲突时表现出的人性的差异！
注：好学区，全部真实
一步进一步，从I don't want to risk any accident到
I am very concerned about unknown dogs in our yard.
再亮证据，把白男的不诚实引出来
sorry--
COVID 两年，很多人都有心理疾病，邻里能和平共处最好。
说个笑话，有个同事的狗突然不吃饭，越来越瘦。几周后找到原因 - 狗带的collar 漏电到金属盆，每次想吃饭，都被电击。同事难过自责了很久。
这件事说明这家华人跟邻居没来往群众关系不好。一般的话小孩跟邻居的狗都是熟的，
见了撸一把毛高兴还来不及猛摇尾巴。邻里互相认识都是在遛狗的时候停下来搭几句话。
能饶人者且饶人。
ABC处理得不错。白男略欠风度。
邻居因为他装了invisible fence,以为狗不会跑出去，这个可以解释为什么他开始那么回答。他最后的回答口气不太好，应该道歉一下。
但是你没写儿子告诉他要叫animal control那段话的措辞。那段话的口气会影响到邻居最后的口气，所以不好judge邻居最后的话是在什么context下说的。
总的说来儿子处理得不错。大部分人都会这么处理。
你朋友看起来好像属于不会处理conflict,随时准备fight的那种。一点小事就上升成war.
Fight or flight的那种。需要向儿子学习
他的狗跑进朋友的院子，狗大叫，朋友吓得大叫，
我老公有个朋友家就是因为邻居关系不佳，对方上门猛敲门是想抱怨，结果被那个邻居误以为是home invasion，给开枪打死了。那个邻居至今都生活在悔恨里。跟邻居把关系弄得特别僵，对于双方都是损失。
邻居没有道歉而是保证朋友往后一个月可以放心剪草，这都是什么逻辑啊！大大方方地说明白有狗来了我家院，想确认一下不是你的就好办了，而且以后见到还要处理。这么婉转委屈只会让人家觉得这是没所谓的事。
可否分享一下你儿子的游泳的情况，让我的孩子学习，学习，谢谢