不得不回复一下，你对NPD的理解太到位了。 NPD一开始的love bombing，真是让人感觉too good to be true的感觉。有句话是这么说来着：If you think something is too good to be true, then it probably is. 然后NPD的devalue阶段开始，猎物会非常的shock。内核不稳的会陷入自我怀疑，伤心；内核强大的会闻到其中的不对劲，这devalue有明显的人为操纵的嫌疑，而有些指控完全不基于事实，简直是睁眼瞎。 要说NPD有什么优势，那就是他们会把自己在纸面上打造的非常好。但他们是没有感情的空心人，所有人在他们眼里就是实现不同用途的工具。
我也比较相信Mayo, 跟贴一个对照加长版吧。 Symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder and how severe they are can vary. People with the disorder can: Have an unreasonably high sense of self-importance and require constant, excessive admiration. Feel that they deserve privileges and special treatment. Expect to be recognized as superior even without achievements. Make achievements and talents seem bigger than they are. Be preoccupied with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate. Believe they are superior to others and can only spend time with or be understood by equally special people. Be critical of and look down on people they feel are not important. Expect special favors and expect other people to do what they want without questioning them. Take advantage of others to get what they want. Have an inability or unwillingness to recognize the needs and feelings of others. Be envious of others and believe others envy them. Behave in an arrogant way, brag a lot and come across as conceited. Insist on having the best of everything — for instance, the best car or office. At the same time, people with narcissistic personality disorder have trouble handling anything they view as criticism. They can: Become impatient or angry when they don''t receive special recognition or treatment. Have major problems interacting with others and easily feel slighted. React with rage or contempt and try to belittle other people to make themselves appear superior. Have difficulty managing their emotions and behavior. Experience major problems dealing with stress and adapting to change. Withdraw from or avoid situations in which they might fail. Feel depressed and moody because they fall short of perfection. Have secret feelings of insecurity, shame, humiliation and fear of being exposed as a failure. https://www.amerikanhastanesi.org/mayo-clinic-care-network/mayo-clinic-health-information-library/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder#:~:text=Mayo%20Clinic&text=Narcissistic%20personality%20disorder%20is%20a,about%20the%20feelings%20of%20others https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eI65CbmTlAc Dr. Phil: What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5cK4z4cYQLY What Causes Narcissistic Personality Disorder?
业余爱好研究人性和人心，有亲生经历的能不能分享真实和npd生活的经历 NPD“长”啥样，为什么和NPD打过交道的人，都有着痛苦不堪的经历？
我现在组里有一个，让周围的人都很痛苦。他符合下面所说的几乎所有特点。一开始只是觉得他喜欢吹牛，倒是没有太大害处。但是当工作压力增大，他达不到预期以后，问题和矛盾就尖锐化了。 mayo给出的npd表现 自负感异常高，需要他人持续的钦佩。 觉得自己应该享受特权和特殊待遇。 即使没有成就，也期望获得优秀的认可。 夸大自己的成就和才能。 痴迷于成功、权势、才华、美丽或完美伴侣的幻想。 认为自己比别人优越，只能与同样特别的人交往或者被他们理解。 批评和看不起他们认为不重要的人。 希望得到特殊优待，希望别人毫无疑问地照着自己的想法做。 占别人便宜以达到自己目的。 无法或不愿意承认他人的需求和感受。 嫉妒别人，也认为别人嫉妒自己。 行为傲慢，经常吹牛，给人以自负的印象。 坚持认为自己应拥有最好的一切，例如，最好的汽车或办公室。
1 NPD喜欢引入第三者triangulate, 是一种pua的方法用于manipulate。 这个蒋姓前女友和他在一起的时候也被他引入前前女友做比较。 2 npd一般不会给人closure，也就是说法。这个也是识别npd的重要标志。 3 正常互相尊重对于NPD来说根本无法满足，因为他们无法自我满足， 要从打压别人， 高人一等上获得满足。心智健全的人一般喜欢平等关系。npd的baseline就是上位
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我最关心的问题是：如果你对一个NPD说，你是NPD，NPD会什么反应？NPD为什么意识不到自己是NPD吗？也就是NPD能不能改掉NPD的这些问题，而变得更加有人性
其实人或多或少都有自恋倾向，又叫全能自恋 但是到NPD就是病态，好像非常折磨人 杨子应该是npd，但是黄圣依也是一个戏精，两人搭配其实挺好的，不用霍霍其他人😄😄
他俩真的离婚了，你不觉得杨子很折磨黄圣依吗？一会儿捧她，一会儿损她，更多的是逼她做很多事，完全不顾及她的感受。 其实杨子还好，还有一种常常会暴怒，特别伤人，就是那种家暴的，到极致，就是陈立人。
关于 tiragulate 这个，我觉得谁都会 triagulate 潜在对象吧，班花系花级花等等其实都是 triangulate？
是的，普通人都有，自恋都有点，也会把现任和ex或者周围的人比对 但是我觉得NPD是显性的特别厉害的，就是没事就拿来比，目的就是manipulate，让配偶臣服
对，我觉得核心在于目的不同。
普通人是为了 support decision making 的目的，NPD 是 manipulate 的目的。
不过从这个角度，中式电视剧里的国女，比娃比老公好像更符合 NPD？女 NPD？
你的最后一句就说明你不了解npd，npd是不会改的，一个人认为自己100%是对的，错都是别人的，自己值得最好，根本不在意别人的感受，你觉得这个人为什么要改，怎么会改？
以为你在形容我爸那一辈的绝大部分男性。反正小时候看到身边这种男性长辈太多了。
正常人把现任跟前任做比较，是在心里比较，不会说出来，更不会对现任说出来。
而NPD，是理直气壮地对现任说”我的前任比你强“，内核是：我能找到更好的，我只是屈尊才找了你。从而达到让现任自卑，更容易被拿捏的目的。
如果在感情关系中，有个人喜欢打压你，对你的成就绝不开心，喜欢对你说：你这样的，除了我谁还会要你。。。。。。就最好警惕一下对方是不是NPD。
我感觉我认识一个人中了每一条
顿感眼前一黑
定神一想，只痴迷才华和美丽。啊还好还好….
自己烂就说别人是NPD。那你工作中无能被老板说，是不是也可以说老板是NPD？ 假命题。
比如乔布斯，手下的人烂，干活不给力，骂两句开除，他就被叫做NPD。
不得不回复一下，你对NPD的理解太到位了。 NPD一开始的love bombing，真是让人感觉too good to be true的感觉。有句话是这么说来着：If you think something is too good to be true, then it probably is. 然后NPD的devalue阶段开始，猎物会非常的shock。内核不稳的会陷入自我怀疑，伤心；内核强大的会闻到其中的不对劲，这devalue有明显的人为操纵的嫌疑，而有些指控完全不基于事实，简直是睁眼瞎。 要说NPD有什么优势，那就是他们会把自己在纸面上打造的非常好。但他们是没有感情的空心人，所有人在他们眼里就是实现不同用途的工具。
triangulation的用意在于，拉拢他人，以胁迫对方接受自己的观点。比如父母一方拉拢子女，跟配偶作对。
不是三角恋，脚踏两条船。
这方面的书很多。Youtube视频也不少。自己去看，获得一手信息，比以讹传讹好。
我也比较相信Mayo, 跟贴一个对照加长版吧。
Symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder and how severe they are can vary. People with the disorder can: Have an unreasonably high sense of self-importance and require constant, excessive admiration. Feel that they deserve privileges and special treatment. Expect to be recognized as superior even without achievements. Make achievements and talents seem bigger than they are. Be preoccupied with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate. Believe they are superior to others and can only spend time with or be understood by equally special people. Be critical of and look down on people they feel are not important. Expect special favors and expect other people to do what they want without questioning them. Take advantage of others to get what they want. Have an inability or unwillingness to recognize the needs and feelings of others. Be envious of others and believe others envy them. Behave in an arrogant way, brag a lot and come across as conceited. Insist on having the best of everything — for instance, the best car or office.
At the same time, people with narcissistic personality disorder have trouble handling anything they view as criticism. They can: Become impatient or angry when they don''t receive special recognition or treatment. Have major problems interacting with others and easily feel slighted. React with rage or contempt and try to belittle other people to make themselves appear superior. Have difficulty managing their emotions and behavior. Experience major problems dealing with stress and adapting to change. Withdraw from or avoid situations in which they might fail. Feel depressed and moody because they fall short of perfection. Have secret feelings of insecurity, shame, humiliation and fear of being exposed as a failure.
https://www.amerikanhastanesi.org/mayo-clinic-care-network/mayo-clinic-health-information-library/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder#:~:text=Mayo%20Clinic&text=Narcissistic%20personality%20disorder%20is%20a,about%20the%20feelings%20of%20others
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eI65CbmTlAc Dr. Phil: What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5cK4z4cYQLY What Causes Narcissistic Personality Disorder?
先天和后天共同作用的。
NPD 的家长有比较大的概率养出NPD 的孩子（如果有多个孩子的NPD家庭，会有NPD 孩子和血包孩子）。
有基因因素。 后天来说就是因为父母自身的心理问题，溺爱，虐待，忽略孩子。
昨晚在知乎做了很多research 脑部前额叶的某些神经的特异性造成的npd，由基因或者大脑出生时候的特异性引起的，受后天的影响不大
NPD和正常的人，差别太大了，NPD无法体验正常人的感受，情感，喜怒哀乐和爱恨情仇，也就是同理心几乎是0
做完research，我突然同情心和圣母心泛滥，觉的npd太可怜了
人类的感情是这个世界上最美好的。NPD永远无法感受到爱情，那种火焰燃烧又绵绵不绝的能量交互所带来的愉悦