I came to the US many years ago. I first went to a small liberal arts college in the Midwest. China had just opened up, so I, like everyone else I knew then, didn''t know much about the outside world. Not surprisingly, as a shy, boyish 20-year-old, soon after I arrived in rural middle America, I began to feel really lonely and completely out of place! Anyhow, I was working in the library one afternoon, heard people mentioning next day being "Thanksgiving," though I had no idea what that was. Honestly, I could care less as I was hearing so many new words daily that it felt overwhelming and confusing most of the time. I vaguely sensed this Thanksgiving thing must be the name of a holiday as there was no school the next day. Most of my classmates had left campus by that afternoon and the library was unusually quiet. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, a slender, middle-aged blonde lady showed up in front of me and introduced herself. "My name is Judy," she said, all smiles, asked for my name, and went on: "If you have no plans tomorrow, will you join our family for Thanksgiving dinner?" Although still new in America, I''d slowly got used to random local strangers approaching and talking to me, yet when a complete stranger suddenly showed up like this and invited me to go to her house, I was still quite shocked. I initially thought I had misunderstood her, but after confirming she was indeed asking me to go to her house the next day, I only became more confused. A few weeks ago, I had been invited to spend a weekend with the family of a classmate named Adam, who I barely knew. In China, you don''t invite someone you barely know to your house, let alone let him sleep over. But at least Adam was a classmate, I know who he was. But who this lady was I had no idea. "Why did she, a total stranger to me, approach me, a total stranger to her, and invite me to her house? What are her ''real motives''?" I asked myself but could find no answer. Yet looking at her face again, which seemed kind, I concluded, at least, she probably wasn''t a malicious person! As agreed, Judy drove over the following day to pick me up from my dorm. On the way to her house, I expressed to her, in my best English, my perplexity about her invitation. I told her that in my country, it was unheard of a complete stranger would invite another stranger to her house for dinners on any occasion. Judy smiled and explained that her family had just moved from a big city to this small town. Since "Thanksgiving is a holiday where family and friends gather," she continued, "I figure a foreign student like you must feel really lonely on this day if you have nowhere to go, so that''s why I went to your college and happened to meet you there." Soon we reached her house, a one-story home not huge but very tidy inside. There I met Lyle, Judy''s husband, tall and muscular, and their four children: the handsome and lanky Jimmy, with his girlfriend Joyce, who appeared really short next to him; Laura, their oldest daughter, a nurse, warm and chatty; Lucy, the light-haired middle daughter, more reserved and Jill, their youngest, a bit younger than me, with darker hair and a playful smile on her face. "Now the kids have grown and moved out," Lyle explained, "we decided to downsize when we moved." "Downsize" is yet another new word, though I managed to guess more or less its meaning in the conversation. I experienced many of the "firsts" in my life on this day: my first Thanksgiving celebration, first time knowing the existence of turkey, first visit to an American family in a holiday and the first taste of those strange American holiday foods (besides turkey): mash potatoes, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, etc. I had been invited to dinner at a professor''s house a couple of months ago. I was quietly indignant by their lack of hospitality towards me - just two simple dishes (spaghetti with meat balls and salads), without realizing this is how many Americans eat for a normal meal. I was relieved Americans do put more than just a few simple dishes on their tables on some occasions - even though every dish still looked and tasted strange to me. I also heard my first "grace" before meals. The English "saying grace, " originated from the Christan prayer gratiarum actio (this Latin phrase roughly means "gratitude action," though it''s usually translated as "offering thanksgiving"), is a ritual before meals meant to express gratitude to the Creator for everything given to us including our foods. As I joined hands with their family and heard Lyle saying the "grace", I realized what was really going on: sure, Judy''s invitation to me may be incomprehensible from the perspective of our culture, but based on her beliefs and traditions, it is a sensible and indeed wonderful gesture, especially on a holiday like Thanksgiving. On that day, I felt as well, for the first time, warmth in a still very strange and foreign land. Naturally it''s difficult to leave one''s family and culture and get thrown into a place where the language, culture and people are so different. If you are not mature enough as I was to deal with this, the world can look downright indifferent and cold. Thankfully on my first Thanksgiving Day, feelings of love and warmth replaced, however temporarily, those of nagging cold and indifference. It''s been said "where kindred spirits exist within the seas, the end of the earth feels home", but let me add that, in today''s increasingly "smaller world," even beyond the seas, no part of the world has to feel foreign as long as you find kindred spirits. At this moment, on the approaching of yet another Thanksgiving, after many years of celebrating it, I feel exceedingly grateful to Judy and her family, though of course, my gratitude list is very long!
Anyhow, I was working in the library one afternoon, heard people mentioning next day being "Thanksgiving," though I had no idea what that was. Honestly, I could care less as I was hearing so many new words daily that it felt overwhelming and confusing most of the time. I vaguely sensed this Thanksgiving thing must be the name of a holiday as there was no school the next day. Most of my classmates had left campus by that afternoon and the library was unusually quiet.
All of a sudden, out of nowhere, a slender, middle-aged blonde lady showed up in front of me and introduced herself. "My name is Judy," she said, all smiles, asked for my name, and went on: "If you have no plans tomorrow, will you join our family for Thanksgiving dinner?" Although still new in America, I''d slowly got used to random local strangers approaching and talking to me, yet when a complete stranger suddenly showed up like this and invited me to go to her house, I was still quite shocked. I initially thought I had misunderstood her, but after confirming she was indeed asking me to go to her house the next day, I only became more confused.
A few weeks ago, I had been invited to spend a weekend with the family of a classmate named Adam, who I barely knew. In China, you don''t invite someone you barely know to your house, let alone let him sleep over. But at least Adam was a classmate, I know who he was. But who this lady was I had no idea. "Why did she, a total stranger to me, approach me, a total stranger to her, and invite me to her house? What are her ''real motives''?" I asked myself but could find no answer. Yet looking at her face again, which seemed kind, I concluded, at least, she probably wasn''t a malicious person!
As agreed, Judy drove over the following day to pick me up from my dorm. On the way to her house, I expressed to her, in my best English, my perplexity about her invitation. I told her that in my country, it was unheard of a complete stranger would invite another stranger to her house for dinners on any occasion. Judy smiled and explained that her family had just moved from a big city to this small town. Since "Thanksgiving is a holiday where family and friends gather," she continued, "I figure a foreign student like you must feel really lonely on this day if you have nowhere to go, so that''s why I went to your college and happened to meet you there."
Soon we reached her house, a one-story home not huge but very tidy inside. There I met Lyle, Judy''s husband, tall and muscular, and their four children: the handsome and lanky Jimmy, with his girlfriend Joyce, who appeared really short next to him; Laura, their oldest daughter, a nurse, warm and chatty; Lucy, the light-haired middle daughter, more reserved and Jill, their youngest, a bit younger than me, with darker hair and a playful smile on her face. "Now the kids have grown and moved out," Lyle explained, "we decided to downsize when we moved." "Downsize" is yet another new word, though I managed to guess more or less its meaning in the conversation. I experienced many of the "firsts" in my life on this day: my first Thanksgiving celebration, first time knowing the existence of turkey, first visit to an American family in a holiday and the first taste of those strange American holiday foods (besides turkey): mash potatoes, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, etc. I had been invited to dinner at a professor''s house a couple of months ago. I was quietly indignant by their lack of hospitality towards me - just two simple dishes (spaghetti with meat balls and salads), without realizing this is how many Americans eat for a normal meal. I was relieved Americans do put more than just a few simple dishes on their tables on some occasions - even though every dish still looked and tasted strange to me.
I also heard my first "grace" before meals. The English "saying grace, " originated from the Christan prayer gratiarum actio (this Latin phrase roughly means "gratitude action," though it''s usually translated as "offering thanksgiving"), is a ritual before meals meant to express gratitude to the Creator for everything given to us including our foods. As I joined hands with their family and heard Lyle saying the "grace", I realized what was really going on: sure, Judy''s invitation to me may be incomprehensible from the perspective of our culture, but based on her beliefs and traditions, it is a sensible and indeed wonderful gesture, especially on a holiday like Thanksgiving.
On that day, I felt as well, for the first time, warmth in a still very strange and foreign land. Naturally it''s difficult to leave one''s family and culture and get thrown into a place where the language, culture and people are so different. If you are not mature enough as I was to deal with this, the world can look downright indifferent and cold. Thankfully on my first Thanksgiving Day, feelings of love and warmth replaced, however temporarily, those of nagging cold and indifference.
It''s been said "where kindred spirits exist within the seas, the end of the earth feels home", but let me add that, in today''s increasingly "smaller world," even beyond the seas, no part of the world has to feel foreign as long as you find kindred spirits. At this moment, on the approaching of yet another Thanksgiving, after many years of celebrating it, I feel exceedingly grateful to Judy and her family, though of course, my gratitude list is very long!
我来美国较早，且去的是中西部的一个小文理学院。当时国内改开不久还很闭塞，我又性格内向未脱稚气，初到白人世界的美国大农村，一开始真是两眼抹黑，孤独不堪！
话说这天还在图书馆打工，第二天就是个什么Thanksgiving。我第一次听说这个词，不知道具体是啥节日，但因为天天几乎随时随刻都在接触新鲜词汇，说实在的已无暇顾及。隐约感到它应是一个挺大的节日，因同学们大都已离开学校，图书馆跟平常比冷清多了。
突然，不知从哪冒出一个身材娇小笑容可掬的金发中年妇女笑眯眯地主动走过来跟我打招呼。她自我介绍说她名叫Judy，明天过节如果我没有安排的话，她要请我去她家吃饭。我虽初来乍到，但几个月来对美国陌生人之间随意搭茬的待人方式已不见怪。不过，一个完全的陌生人第一次见面就猛然邀我去她家吃饭做客，这着实让我吃惊。我开始还以为听错了，反问几次知道没有听错就立刻产生了国内来的人本能的敏感加疑虑。
数周前我也被一个刚认识没说过几句话的同学Adam邀请去他家过周末，当时也让我纳闷过。自己在中国从没请一面之交的同学到自己家做客，更别说过夜了。但Adam好歹是我的同学，这Judy还是太不可思议了。见她诚恳友善的面孔，我直感这是一个善人，不会有啥恶意。但一个素不相识的人上来就邀一个外国穷学生去她家吃饭，她是为什么？我百思不得其解。
第二天按预定计划Judy开车接我去她家的路上我小心翼翼地把自己的疑问说了出来。我说逢年过节一个陌生人邀请另外一个陌生人去自己家里吃饭，这种事情我在我自己的国家还没有听说过。Judy点点头微笑了一下。她接着解释到她全家刚从附近一个大城市搬过来这个大学小城。因为Thanksgiving 是美国家人朋友团聚的一个节日，她就想大学里的外国学生可能有人无处可去会很孤独，所以就这样去了我们学校，并撞见了我……说着说着就到她家了。
这是个不大但收拾得干干净净的一层平房。见到了Judy魁梧的丈夫Lyle,和他们的四个孩子：高大帅气的老大Jimmy和他矮矮的女朋友Joyce, 做护士嘴快的大女儿Laura，大学快毕业一头金发安静的二女儿Lucy, 还有跟我同岁长着褐色头发调皮的小女儿Jill。“孩子们都长大自己搬出去住了，我们搬过来就downsize了。”Judy 笑道。Downsize对我也是个新词，但我不难猜出其意。
这一天我经历了很多我人生的第一次：第一次过感恩节，第一次见到火鸡，第一次到美国人家里看他们怎么过节，第一次见识并品尝到美国人节日的大餐和餐桌上一道道新奇的食物：土豆泥、红莓酱(cranberry sauce)、南瓜饼等等。几个月前我去一个教授家吃饭，当时见到简单的一两样食物，心里还抱怨这教授待客如此草率真没礼貌，后来了解到不少美国人平时吃饭就这样简单。那天在Judy家才明白原来西餐也可以做得很丰盛考究的，只是和我们中餐风味及吃法大不相同！
也第一次见人饭前say grace，用中文讲就是饭前祷告这个习俗。”Saying grace”是源于拉丁语gratiarum actio (“gratitude act”,英文通译为offering thanksgiving)这个基督教传统里饭前所念的一个祷文，意在感谢为我们提供了万物包括食物的上苍这样一种信仰。那天当Judy全家加上我手拉手低着头由Lyle说grace - 感谢上苍提供食物，感谢家人可以团聚，感谢有新朋友来访等等，我明白了Judy邀请一个陌生人节日到家做客，在我们的文化里也许有些不可理喻，但从她的文化信仰角度出发，却是自然正常的事情；也切身体会到美国人过感恩节这个传统的本意。
那一个感恩节，我也初次在异国他乡领略到一种温暖。人离开自己熟悉的家人、同胞和语言，来到完全不同文化语言或人种的地方，感到孤独无聊是难免的。如果又是我这种不太成熟的人，有时甚至无时无刻不感叹世界好冷漠。但在我的第一次感恩节那一天，有种亲爱与温暖暂时代替了我初到海外时天天面对的孤独冷漠。古人云“海内存知己，天涯若比邻”，时至不断变小的今日世界，我要说“海外遇知己，天涯亦比邻”。几十年来我过了很多感恩节，如今节日又至，我此时此刻要感恩Judy，但要感恩的又岂只有她！
贴主:pilingjushi于2022_11_16 8:17:45编辑
谢谢！