Sebastian left us at about 3:45 pm yesterday. He went so quickly, in a matter of seconds after the second injection. His eyes looked so empty, his nose and paw pads no longer pink, his body so limp. I held him in my lap and cried, painful sobs where I couldn''t catch my breath. I didn''t want to take a picture, because I didn''t want to remember him like that. The vet wrapped him in his favorite blanket, the brown one he liked to lay on in the cat tree, and took him. And now he''s gone. It feels like there''s a hole in my chest, and I don''t know if it''ll ever stop hurting. I''ve just been thinking about all the things he used to do. The memories come at me almost automatically. The first time I brought him home as a kitten. His tiny tail with the white tip. The way he''d sleep upside down and curled up, and I didn''t know how he was comfortable like that. I keep expecting him to wander by, or meow at me. I keep wanting him to be there, but he won''t be, ever again. God it hurts. Yesterday I was counting down the hours. 3 hours, 2 hours, 25 minutes until the vet gets here, and his world ends. Today, and for the rest of my life, I''ll be counting up. It''s been 20 hours since he''s been gone. Then it''ll be one day, then a week, a month, and on and on. I know it''ll get easier, but right now it feels like I''m staring at an impossibly high mountain, and I just want to lie down. I hope he''s frolicking somewhere in a beautiful field, playing with butterflies and chasing things through the grass. I hope he''s got absolutely no pain, and he''s light and free and so happy in the warm sunshine. I hope he feels me thinking about him, missing him, overwhelmed by my thoughts of him. I hope he feels my love.
Sebastian read world news:
Sebastian （cremated） at home:
还有家里的猫，大人不喜欢，把她的腿打坏了，我嚎啕大哭。后来不知道是给打死了还是撵跑了，每当围墙上有走过的猫，我总希望是那一只。
天啊，你这家里人….
9岁。 cancer, 手术后扩散了。Chemo 没救过来。
抱抱。 有你这样尽责又充满爱的主人，它的一生也是值得和没有被辜负的。
in tears. 希望世界上多一些爱。
现在我自己养了一只猫，和爸妈聊天的时候他们总会说猫脏会传染疾病，让我扔掉，我说不可能。明年他们会过来住一阵，为了猫崽子的安全，我大概会带着他出去流浪。。。
小时候我们最好的朋友几乎都是宠物。我经常抱着我的小狗睡午觉。 长大后再也没有那么纯粹的友谊了。
理解你的心情，我也是这个原因一直没有再养，因为没有后来者能代替。20年后我终于放下了，才又领养了一只猫，后来又领养了好几只，想把对它的爱扩散到更多需要帮助的猫猫身上，也算是对它的一种缅怀吧。
可是它又不是野狗，是被拴在院子里，也不能自己去找朋友，而且狗天性是要出去玩的，自己一个呆着会抑郁的，这比野狗更惨啊。不过我也做不到过于谴责那个lz，他更大可能只是不懂，如果他知道狗被这样对待很惨他应该不会这样做的。
真的想骂人了，这家和之前卖狗打猫那家的父母，简直自私残忍到了极点。不过话说回来，这样的 中国人不少。
我昨晚上搜了一下家附近有没有来家里送娃走的兽医，其实也就是防患未然，觉得心里有个谱，可没想到这个举动让我一整夜就没睡着觉，心理刺痛挥之不去。想起了好久没想起的小妞儿。
抱抱LZ，孩子会在那边等你。你先好好的他就好好的。
长大以后再养一只狗就又收获了纯粹的爱
而且还生活在自己的排泄物里
我天，确定你家人不是sociopath吗。。。
哎呀，看来这个潘多拉盒子不能随便开。我最近开始添置老年狗的东西，sofa ramp啊，elevated 饭盆架子啊（特想分享，待会发给你），接受现实。希望你今天心情好一点。