你觉得孩子跟谁姓很重要吗?

D
Dialog
楼主 (北美华人网)
The idea of surnames existed well before social security numbers, blood samples, and photo IDs: they provided a way to track someone''''''''s lineage, which was a big deal in the olden days.
If you were a child of someone, then everyone knew which family you came from. If your parents passed on, then it was known what would be bequeathed unto you. And if you were a woman marrying into a man''''''''s family, there was an idea that you now "belonged" to them. And while feeling like you "belong" to a tribe or group is definitely not a bad thing, the concept of ownership and women taking their husband''''''''s last names and thus losing their own identities is one that has been oft-argued.
Many women are electing to keep their own last names upon getting married as time progresses, and then there are hyphenated last names or even men who take on the surnames of their wives. It''''''''s an issue that some folks have very strong opinions about, but in the case of one recently married couple who went viral on TikTok, they were willing to leave it all up to change. Unless one of them is capable of telekinesis.
@diaryofasolotraveler Congrats my friends!!!! ❤️🙈 #weddingtiktok #weddingtraditions #weddingtrends #weddingtok💍 #weddingtiktok2022 #weddingday #friendsgettingmarried #BridgertonScandal #WomenOwnedBusiness #OscarsAtHome #UnsealTheMeal ♬ Just a Cloud Away - Pharrell Williams

Pearl and Collin Hansen (spoiler alert) first met while working the same Friday night shifts at the college they both attended. Perhaps they bonded over the fact that they''''''''re the kind of folks who don''''''''t mind sacrificing the beginning of the weekend in order to make extra money, or that they''''''''re both really into coin flips.



The couple often uses the Harvey Dent method of making decisions and also as a way of them figuring out "what they truly want" Collin told Insider in an interview, so for them to decide on a common last name utilizing this method was a natural fit for the two.

SOURCE: TIKTOK | @DIARYOFASOLOTRAVELER Pearl was feeling a bit conflicted regarding the issue of last names as she was a teacher and all of the children she instructs refer to her by her maiden name, Lee. Now you might be asking yourself: why didn''''''''t they just keep their respective last names? Well, the issue is a bit more complicated than that.
For both Pearl and Collin, they were going to be the last folks in their respective families to carry on their individual surnames and they knew that they both wanted to share the same last name, but the question was: which would it be?


That''''''''s where the coin toss comes in, an idea that Pearl heard while listening to the Freakonomics podcast where someone quipped that they should''''''''ve just flipped a quarter to decide what their last name was going to be when they were married. Pearl thought that the idea was "really funny," and Collin was on board with it as well.


The moment of truth, the coin toss that decided the surname, was actually recorded by someone in attendance at the wedding, TikToker Alyssa Danielle who posts under the handle @diaryofasolotraveler.



It didn''''''''t take long for the clip to go viral on the platform, something that the newly married couple only became privy to while they were one their honeymoon and they began receiving messages from friends and family members who saw them online.

SOURCE: TIKTOK | @DIARYOFASOLOTRAVELER "It was honestly just so ironic that the thing that we''''''''d get our 15 minutes of fame for was a coin flip," Pearl said. As mentioned above their names are Pearl and Collin Hansen, meaning that he won the coin toss and Pearl is going to have to tell her students that Ms. Lee is now Mrs. Hansen. Or maybe she could just have a work pseudonym.


As for their advice on picking who gets which last name? Collin offered up some of his own experience in the matter for any other couples who are having a difficult time deciding: "The coin flip''''''''s definitely an option, but I think that honestly, it''''''''s most important that you''''''''re both comfortable with whatever''''''''s happening because you will get pushback."
M
Milkteaholica
如果不重要,男性为什么不主动放弃呢,得了便宜就别不卖乖了
P
Pangpang
我想了想,如果我的孩子,一个跟他爹的姓,一个跟我姓。我不能保证我不偏心跟我姓的那个。所以孩子最好还是不要姓不同的姓。
c
ca563
我想了想,如果我的孩子,一个跟他爹的姓,一个跟我姓。我不能保证我不偏心跟我姓的那个。所以孩子最好还是不要姓不同的姓。
Pangpang 发表于 2022-05-10 10:41

你可以努力让两个孩子都跟你的姓
c
ccheetos
我想了想,如果我的孩子,一个跟他爹的姓,一个跟我姓。我不能保证我不偏心跟我姓的那个。所以孩子最好还是不要姓不同的姓。
Pangpang 发表于 2022-05-10 10:41

惊呆,我以为就男人有这种封建遗毒,原来女人也有
章鱼小丸子_V
相当于问黑人种族歧重不重要。
C
Cath226
我想了想,如果我的孩子,一个跟他爹的姓,一个跟我姓。我不能保证我不偏心跟我姓的那个。所以孩子最好还是不要姓不同的姓。
Pangpang 发表于 2022-05-10 10:41

所以都跟爹姓,你就俩都不爱了?
d
dpdpdp
进步人类都不需要有姓。我记得NBA有个明星就没有Last Name。
c
ccheetos
所以都跟爹姓,你就俩都不爱了?
Cath226 发表于 2022-05-10 10:53

看起来是这个意思
C
Cumberbitch
在宗族势力大的地方就重要啊 比如说一村人都姓林,你明明姓林,自己改姓郎,那就有什么好事儿或者需要帮忙都轮不到你呗,然后受欺负受排挤 如果你谁都不需要,在大城市生活,周围都是小家庭,你谁都不靠那可以随便改姓
P
Pangpang
所以都跟爹姓,你就俩都不爱了?
Cath226 发表于 2022-05-10 10:53

哈哈😄,无论如何都爱 我只是幻想一下,就是心理作用吧。。。 觉得孩子也可能会有同样的心理暗示 我个人觉得姓什么不重要,但不喜欢俩孩子两姓。
c
crazyeater
我觉得孩子跟谁姓不重要,老公跟我姓就行了
i
i机器人
哈哈😄,无论如何都爱 我只是幻想一下,就是心理作用吧。。。 觉得孩子也可能会有同样的心理暗示 我个人觉得姓什么不重要,但不喜欢俩孩子两姓。
Pangpang 发表于 2022-05-10 10:59

我觉得男的肯定不会这样想 爱不爱是不是婚生离婚都要跟他们姓
s
sunnypotato
男人因为孩子姓氏杀人的都有。你说重要不重要?
s
sunnypotato
菲利普亲王没有王位,都要求孩子必须跟自己姓呢
公用马甲4
孩子跟谁姓我无所谓,别让我结婚改姓就行。
m
majiagou
结婚的时候两人合计着起一个有意义的新的姓就了结了。美国可以随便改姓改名,两人一起去办个改名手续就行了。孩子都姓这个新的姓,然后孩子们如果一天结婚了想再合计一个新姓就再改,想接着用也行。
H
HappyHappyLife
The idea of surnames existed well before social security numbers, blood samples, and photo IDs: they provided a way to track someone''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''s lineage, which was a big deal in the olden days.
If you were a child of someone, then everyone knew which family you came from. If your parents passed on, then it was known what would be bequeathed unto you. And if you were a woman marrying into a man''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''s family, there was an idea that you now "belonged" to them. And while feeling like you "belong" to a tribe or group is definitely not a bad thing, the concept of ownership and women taking their husband''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''s last names and thus losing their own identities is one that has been oft-argued.
Many women are electing to keep their own last names upon getting married as time progresses, and then there are hyphenated last names or even men who take on the surnames of their wives. It''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''s an issue that some folks have very strong opinions about, but in the case of one recently married couple who went viral on TikTok, they were willing to leave it all up to change. Unless one of them is capable of telekinesis.
@diaryofasolotraveler Congrats my friends!!!! ❤️🙈 #weddingtiktok #weddingtraditions #weddingtrends #weddingtok💍 #weddingtiktok2022 #weddingday #friendsgettingmarried #BridgertonScandal #WomenOwnedBusiness #OscarsAtHome #UnsealTheMeal ♬ Just a Cloud Away - Pharrell Williams

Pearl and Collin Hansen (spoiler alert) first met while working the same Friday night shifts at the college they both attended. Perhaps they bonded over the fact that they''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''re the kind of folks who don''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''t mind sacrificing the beginning of the weekend in order to make extra money, or that they''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''re both really into coin flips.



The couple often uses the Harvey Dent method of making decisions and also as a way of them figuring out "what they truly want" Collin told Insider in an interview, so for them to decide on a common last name utilizing this method was a natural fit for the two.

SOURCE: TIKTOK | @DIARYOFASOLOTRAVELER Pearl was feeling a bit conflicted regarding the issue of last names as she was a teacher and all of the children she instructs refer to her by her maiden name, Lee. Now you might be asking yourself: why didn''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''t they just keep their respective last names? Well, the issue is a bit more complicated than that.
For both Pearl and Collin, they were going to be the last folks in their respective families to carry on their individual surnames and they knew that they both wanted to share the same last name, but the question was: which would it be?


That''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''s where the coin toss comes in, an idea that Pearl heard while listening to the Freakonomics podcast where someone quipped that they should''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''ve just flipped a quarter to decide what their last name was going to be when they were married. Pearl thought that the idea was "really funny," and Collin was on board with it as well.


The moment of truth, the coin toss that decided the surname, was actually recorded by someone in attendance at the wedding, TikToker Alyssa Danielle who posts under the handle @diaryofasolotraveler.



It didn''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''t take long for the clip to go viral on the platform, something that the newly married couple only became privy to while they were one their honeymoon and they began receiving messages from friends and family members who saw them online.

SOURCE: TIKTOK | @DIARYOFASOLOTRAVELER "It was honestly just so ironic that the thing that we''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''d get our 15 minutes of fame for was a coin flip," Pearl said. As mentioned above their names are Pearl and Collin Hansen, meaning that he won the coin toss and Pearl is going to have to tell her students that Ms. Lee is now Mrs. Hansen. Or maybe she could just have a work pseudonym.


As for their advice on picking who gets which last name? Collin offered up some of his own experience in the matter for any other couples who are having a difficult time deciding: "The coin flip''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''s definitely an option, but I think that honestly, it''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''s most important that you''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''re both comfortable with whatever''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''s happening because you will get pushback."
Dialog 发表于 2022-05-10 10:29

这种不痛不痒的事儿,别说孩子了,我跟谁姓都没关系,纠结这些有的没的
女人经济独立思想独立,比这些有的没的来的重要多了
m
meimeitou2
所以都跟爹姓,你就俩都不爱了?
Cath226 发表于 2022-05-10 10:53

哈哈哈,我看男权社会最成功的,八成就是把部分女人洗脑洗得被卖了还帮着数钱。
扶苏
现在这个世道,就是人心浮躁,按耐不住的要斗。就跟以前的革命小将一样,总得找点事情闹啊。拆了庙,拆了匾额,烧四旧,画,旧书,衣服。总之,不停闹。找到一个借口就闹呗。
其实闹这个的人,有几个真正是为了社会,为了女性,为了后代?比如,公开讽刺不认同的女性,不想让孩子跟自己姓的女性是娇妻之类的。可见,不是真的为女性好,而是与天斗,与人斗,其乐无穷罢了。

x
xwei26
我觉得不重要,但说不重要就跟女方姓的和跟男方姓不是一个意思吗?
我希望能随便给小孩取个好听的姓名,可是好像国内的户籍规定不能随便姓,当然我也没有这个烦恼就是了。很久以前琢磨过,肯定不会让小孩跟我姓,不好听,奶奶和外婆的姓也不好听,想取个没有姓的名字,后来看到户籍规定,就没再研究过了。
m
minionpenjuin
天呐,啥年代了,有没有姓都无所谓啦
d
dngdnhxqs
我喜欢孩子们一个姓,跟谁无所谓。
一粒橘子
我们双独,还只有一个娃,娃和老公姓,我家这支就断了,想想对不起我爸可也不会为了这个再生一个,反正我家也没王位可以继承.
r
riple
有钱人才有资格说自己不爱钱,在小孩可以随便跟谁姓而不被人judge的时候才能说和谁姓不重要,现在还早着呢。
a
anw
名正言顺
取名真的好难啊
跟爹姓是爷爷的姓,跟妈姓是姥爷/外公的姓,反正都是男人的姓。
c
chikorita
我们双独,还只有一个娃,娃和老公姓,我家这支就断了,想想对不起我爸可也不会为了这个再生一个,反正我家也没王位可以继承.
一粒橘子 发表于 2022-05-10 12:05

姓都是虚的,只有DNA不会作假,能延续自己家族的基因,已经做到了生物繁衍的本质目的。
l
longtai
我是女的,我觉得不太重要,因为我就姓妈妈的姓。 我爸爸的姓好听并且很稀有,我希望我小孩姓姥爷的姓,但是觉得会有一堆麻烦事,还是姓了爹的。
c
ca563
有钱人才有资格说自己不爱钱,在小孩可以随便跟谁姓而不被人judge的时候才能说和谁姓不重要,现在还早着呢。
riple 发表于 2022-05-10 12:22

没错,说不在乎的,要不就是有信心肯定能跟自己姓的(比如男人),要不就是没有可能争取到跟自己姓的(比如自欺欺人的女人)。