一週前的事情,據說是跳桥自杀,MIT剛開學沒多久的大一新生,唉 Dear MIT Parent Community: We mourn the passing of Mason Weinstock, Class of 2025. Support is available at: DoingWell.mit.edu ———————————————————————— To the members of the MIT community, With great sadness, I write to let you know that Mason Weinstock, a first-year undergraduate, died suddenly this weekend. He was not on campus at the time. As Mason’s family and friends absorb this extremely painful news, I hope we can offer them the loving support of our community. Following the rhythms of his father’s military career, Mason spent his early years in Japan, Hawaii and California before his family settled in McLean, Virginia, just outside Washington, DC. In high school, he was an outstanding swimmer who excelled at the breaststroke. His family tells us he also had a huge heart. “Coach Mason” spent his summers joyfully teaching little kids to swim, and throughout the pandemic, he took extra time to help his younger brother manage the challenges of attending school remotely. When Mason wasn’t in the pool, he loved collecting baseball statistics, playing soccer and passionately following the premier league. Quietly brilliant, curious, analytical and introspective, he was eager to explore mechanical engineering at MIT. Mason lived in MacGregor. Chancellor Melissa Nobles and Vice Chancellor and Dean for Student Life Suzy Nelson and their teams are reaching out directly to support anyone on campus who knew him. If you are hurting in any way and could use guidance or a consoling conversation, please know that you are not alone, and you do not have to struggle alone. All of us need help from time to time – and there is no shame in asking. Our new doingwell.mit.edu website makes it easy for undergraduates and graduate students to find the right support. As always, staff, postdocs and faculty can seek support through MyLife Services, and we also offer special resources to help faculty and staff help their students. Coming at the start of a new school year, and after so many months of pandemic uncertainty and separation, this news is unsettling and difficult for us all. Sometimes the greatest comfort we can find is in comforting each other: May we honor Mason’s huge heart by taking special care to check in with and listen to those around us, old friends and new. With deepest sympathy, L. Rafael Reif xq1001 发表于 2021-09-20 11:56
一週前的事情,據說是跳桥自杀,MIT剛開學沒多久的大一新生,唉 Dear MIT Parent Community: We mourn the passing of Mason Weinstock, Class of 2025. Support is available at: DoingWell.mit.edu ———————————————————————— To the members of the MIT community, With great sadness, I write to let you know that Mason Weinstock, a first-year undergraduate, died suddenly this weekend. He was not on campus at the time. As Mason’s family and friends absorb this extremely painful news, I hope we can offer them the loving support of our community. Following the rhythms of his father’s military career, Mason spent his early years in Japan, Hawaii and California before his family settled in McLean, Virginia, just outside Washington, DC. In high school, he was an outstanding swimmer who excelled at the breaststroke. His family tells us he also had a huge heart. “Coach Mason” spent his summers joyfully teaching little kids to swim, and throughout the pandemic, he took extra time to help his younger brother manage the challenges of attending school remotely. When Mason wasn’t in the pool, he loved collecting baseball statistics, playing soccer and passionately following the premier league. Quietly brilliant, curious, analytical and introspective, he was eager to explore mechanical engineering at MIT. Mason lived in MacGregor. Chancellor Melissa Nobles and Vice Chancellor and Dean for Student Life Suzy Nelson and their teams are reaching out directly to support anyone on campus who knew him. If you are hurting in any way and could use guidance or a consoling conversation, please know that you are not alone, and you do not have to struggle alone. All of us need help from time to time – and there is no shame in asking. Our new doingwell.mit.edu website makes it easy for undergraduates and graduate students to find the right support. As always, staff, postdocs and faculty can seek support through MyLife Services, and we also offer special resources to help faculty and staff help their students. Coming at the start of a new school year, and after so many months of pandemic uncertainty and separation, this news is unsettling and difficult for us all. Sometimes the greatest comfort we can find is in comforting each other: May we honor Mason’s huge heart by taking special care to check in with and listen to those around us, old friends and new. With deepest sympathy, L. Rafael Reif xq1001 发表于 2021-09-20 11:56
估计lz想ed
我们这里有个IMO的替补,数学竞赛全国top 7, 数竞成绩就好了吧,M就没要。吓得周围的家长都不想推竞赛了。
没拿offer前,好像没必要想那么多吧
re 自杀基本都是抑郁症,跟nerd半毛钱关系也没有
为啥对心理医生逆反情绪这么大啊?是不是家长总是说些negative 的话影响到孩子? 找Therapist 的话可以具体教一下社交技巧,但是更重要的是让孩子思考自己的需要,他喜欢什么样的朋友,跟什么样的人相处舒服等等。孩子了解了自己的社交需要,交朋友就是事半功倍。当然能让孩子敞开心扉的therapist 要多试试。
另外也不必说找心理医生,有针对性地找coach, 比如有的人time management 技巧差就找executive function coach。
关键是家长也要改变看法,数学不好的SAT成绩差的可以找补习班,社交技巧差的找个coach, 有什么差别吗?千万别给自己孩子乱贴负面标签。
我们这几年前有个中国女孩在MIT上学,自杀了。
我觉得你说的挺有道理的,自我感觉和现实录取是有差距的。我之前一个同事给我讲他朋友的小孩申请,也是男生,硬件指标都很出色,数学奖,体育奖,也有公益活动,SAT高分,GPA满分,信心满满的申请了几个藤,也申请了几个藤之外的一流大学,结果出乎预料,一个offer都没拿到,而且同班一个比他考试差了200分的录取了一个名校,小孩一下子抑郁了,不吃不喝不出门,爸爸妈妈吓得整天陪着他,生怕出意外,最后父母都放下工作,陪小孩出门散心,终于妥协就上家门口的州立,等上研究生的时候再考虑申请名校。
现在的essay都是包装有人把关的,那些升学顾问改过的essay根本看不出什么负面信息
哎,同意这个观点。
情商的作用,只有在智商类似的情况下才能体现出来。
智商决定了你进哪个阶层/圈子。 情商决定了你在这个阶层/圈子里上升的难易程度。
楼主不要因为觉得孩子情商低,就人工的限定他能去的圈子。
而且都12年纪了,这个事情应该有孩子自己做主。
看看扎克伯格,比尔盖茨,都是著名大nerdy. 都是藤校出身吧。他们上大学的时候,都不是什么popular的人物。
智商+persistent 才是决定成功的重要因素。
看描述,你家孩子的困难不是情商低,倒是情绪处理不稳定。这个需要注意一下。
哈普耶斯麻
认识的人里面mit的nerd多点,斯坦福毕业的双商高的都多些,都是理工类的
自己的弯路还得自己走。爸妈不能代替全部。你们不应该担心大学申请,倒是应该担心以后怎么找对象。哈哈哈。
是的,我觉得楼主现在发愁要不要申请藤校真是完全没必要的烦恼。这年头难道不是全申请,到时候看能拿到什么offer再说嘛?华人男孩子申藤最难,各种学术竞赛亮眼十分自信的package最后全军覆没的例子年年都很多见。 其实帮助孩子增进社交,心胸开朗,情绪稳定,比上什么大学更重要。 之前那个MIT的潘,奥数银牌入了MIT,够理想了吧。最后竟然因为一点感情纠纷杀了耶鲁的男生,而那女生甚至都不是他的正式女友,多半只是他暗恋罢了。这种就是从小父母只顾推学习,不管孩子心理健康的。
你狠,给楼主看这个。
ED只能选一个吧
kankan…
现在的AO就喜欢childish style essay,对升学顾问的包装挺敏感alert的。
你确定知道大学面试是怎么work的? 一般不都是校友面试? 除非完全搞砸,面试结果并没有多大作用。和找工作的面试完全不一样。
请问楼主的娃是奥数金牌么?担心的点好特别。
MIT/Caltech 楼主能说说孩子有什么大奖吗?
为啥觉得自己是藤校门槛 先申请吧 谁知道能不能被录取呢
第一个数学能拿到大奖的还真不一定是家长推出来的 很多数学有天赋的就天生不是那种爱社交的性格 小时候看过一本数学家的传记,记得年纪轻轻就自杀的有好几个
有梦就去追!孩子自己都设好目标了,当然申请看看。既然在门槛上,不试试可惜。现在想之后的事情有点太早。 真拿到offer,大概率跟学校是fit的。具体的concern可以到时候再跟招生办聊聊,看学校有没有相应的support或者建议。也许到了藤校,周围很多相似的人,反而交到朋友,如鱼得水。 楼主可能也担心被拒了,孩子心理能不能承受。这个你就得给他心理建设一下了。面对失败是人生必修课,迟早要来的。
去访问学校重点都看些啥?还是就校园里随便走走感觉一下?
医学院那都是人精,层层面试上来的,nerd非常之少。
有招生办讲解,有学生带着参观学校,讲解一些从学生角度的问题。然后可以单独和招生办的人员提问你关切的问题。
最后可以写why这类小作文,可以非常有自己真实且独特的感受。
我孩子现在想ed的学校本来不在他的list上,我们顺路路过决定去看一下。 结果发生一连串的事,他得到一个私人的tour,让他学到很多。
这是要收到校方邀请吧,还是自己就可以加入?
官网上预定即可。 上面我更新了一下我们没有预定的经历。
除了成绩不错,有什么拿得出手的课外活动吗?老师的推荐怎么样?另外essay很重要
ED 难道不是只能一个吗?为什么会有一和二
MIT第一个学期所有的课程都是pass/fail,没有打分ABCD的。就是怕刚进学校的学生适应不了
说不定他可能遇到了其他问题呢?比如被女朋友甩了之类的?
打游戏能交很多朋友
孩子走弯路是因为父母无知还不自知 你所谓情商低,基本都是没本事没背景又不想付出,整天想着走捷径。总是觉得别人努力干活,自己去溜须拍马说两句好的就能得到晋升 你去看看网上那些成功学“大师”,他们整天就是讲所谓情商,怎么走捷径,怎么一穷二白瞬间暴富,怎么说两句漂亮话就把马云迷得神魂颠倒。
你这种态度很容易把孩子影响成讨好型人格,为了交朋友而交朋友 朋友要么是共同利益,要么是共同兴趣,如果两点都没有,你拼命想着去讨好人家,最后十有八九会被当猴耍
上什么学校倒是其次。看到孩子在情绪和社交上有struggle, 倒是更令人担心。
大学这种申请制,太多不可预测的因素。谁知道那些AO什么思路。我们这高中是州里前十。今年去哈佛的是个学习成绩很一般的黑人女孩,去年在local带着搞BLM 活动的。最近去比较好学校的,大多是黑人女孩。咱华人追藤,人家藤不知在追啥。
每年都有太多申请者觉得自己肯定上藤却被直接reject了。所以合理期待,尽力而为,随缘自在更好些。
这种人不会因为不推数学或其他比赛而变得开朗的,性格在那了,如果再没有个特长,人生更加失败。我一个邻居小孩就是啥啥不推的,高中就休学,在家天天打游戏。 这种孩子其实从小应该上私校,心智教育更加全面一些。
cs group project一点不少。
真好
申请大学不是简单填个表交个费就完了的。排名靠前的大学往往有比较刁钻的多篇小作文要写,另外还要有老师的推荐信,以及课外活动的成绩,impact等等。
普通大学有个common app,排名靠前的大学往往是自己单独搞一套。另外还有Early decision (ED), Early Action, Restricted Early Action/Single Choice Early Action, 后来还有ED1, ED2。除此之外名校往往还有校友面试之类的环节。
打个比方,你去热门的米其林三星餐馆吃饭,要提前很久定位,有的地方还有着装要求,这个跟去麦当劳吃饭能一样吗。当然实际上米其林三星也不见得有多好吃,如果只看卡路里,麦当劳也完全可以果腹。