回复 1楼xinchina的帖子 1.以上八个维度的自我关怀，你平衡的如何 Cognitive: I am doing good in this area. I am aware and frequently seek to know how I think. I share some Asperger brain. lol... Financial: I am working on the improvement in this area. A lot of departments in my household need to allocated my resource to organize and maintain them. Luminescent: keep myself openminded, speak the truth with love with gentle, meek, and non judgmental way. 慢慢地，因心意更新而變化。 Emotive: Still learning communicate in a way that a neurotypical type would understand me. Good that my Sir husband can use my language to communicate with me and understand my way of expressing myself. Systemic: Eat, I enjoy cooking and eating on the same schedule every day. Rest, I rest on schedule every day. Move, I need to work on it. I need to do stretch and walking exercise every day. Somedays, I forget, because I am still trying to sort out my early morning activities, try to put my stretching exercise in the morning routine and walking exercise in the afternoon routine. Environmental: I don't let food go waste into the sink. I eat left over food like a garbage can. I do gardening work once a while. Relational: my Sir husband is working on it with me in this area. Being active member in this forums is one of the way I connect with others. Aptitudinal: Help keep my Sir mental, emotional, and physical healthy so he can continue to contribute to the world. 2.你花多少时间自我关怀，以及你最喜欢的self care方式？ I don't know how much time. I think I like Systemic way the best. 3.对你的性生活有什么样的影响？ The more I take care of myself in the Systemic way, the better I can take my Sir husband's rough sex. In his time, where, and how. For example, this afternoon, when I was active on this forums, he asked me to take a nap with him on the sofa. End up my mouth, my vagina, my hands were very active on his penis and he direct me to rock on top of his body in order to give me pleasure until I need rest, then he cum on my belly. At last, we cuddle with a sound sleep together in harmony.
1.以下八个维度的自我关怀，你平衡的如何？ 2.你花多少时间自我关怀，以及你最喜欢的self care方式？ 3.对你的性生活有什么样的影响？
2.我自己最近特别喜欢的self care是泡澡的时候放冥想音乐，点个蜡烛，让家人帮我看娃，我放空一下下。水里撒上盐，看着烛光摇曳，听着音乐，觉得自己真的就是水做的。
3.我很了解自己状态不好的时候，其实就是自我关爱没做好，我会找茬，会觉得委屈。当我自己状态好的时候，我看对方就特别的顺眼，身体是不会说谎的，会非常期待每次的亲密。
顺便推荐一个浴缸的一次性liner，以前想到泡澡要洗浴缸就经常作罢，买了这个后非常开心，不用洗浴缸了。
https://www.amazon.com/AGPTEK-Disposable-Bathtub-Plastic-Household/dp/B086C1SDY9/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?dchild=1&keywords=disposable+liner+for+bathtub&qid=1608775174&sr=8-1-spons&psc=1&smid=A1TVDUW3K6CWWG&spLa=ZW5jcnlwdGVkUXVhbGlmaWVyPUEySENTNEw0NkdKS0hJJmVuY3J5cHRlZElkPUEwNTI0MjA3MzZOWDJQN0hZU1BISyZlbmNyeXB0ZWRBZElkPUEwNjMyMzY5Sjk5WTA1WTQySzhDJndpZGdldE5hbWU9c3BfYXRmJmFjdGlvbj1jbGlja1JlZGlyZWN0JmRvTm90TG9nQ2xpY2s9dHJ1ZQ==
我也推荐这种liner。简直大大降低了泡澡的心理门槛（要不然我嫌准备工作麻烦）。 还可以两个人泡。把卫生间的灯关了，点几个蜡烛，闭着眼睛，说说话。 一个人的时候加一个这种架子，看个小电影啥的，也不错。
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01NCY1OVU/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o03_s01?ie=UTF8&psc=1
1.以上八个维度的自我关怀，你平衡的如何 Cognitive: I am doing good in this area. I am aware and frequently seek to know how I think. I share some Asperger brain. lol... Financial: I am working on the improvement in this area. A lot of departments in my household need to allocated my resource to organize and maintain them. Luminescent: keep myself openminded, speak the truth with love with gentle, meek, and non judgmental way. 慢慢地，因心意更新而變化。 Emotive: Still learning communicate in a way that a neurotypical type would understand me. Good that my Sir husband can use my language to communicate with me and understand my way of expressing myself. Systemic: Eat, I enjoy cooking and eating on the same schedule every day. Rest, I rest on schedule every day. Move, I need to work on it. I need to do stretch and walking exercise every day. Somedays, I forget, because I am still trying to sort out my early morning activities, try to put my stretching exercise in the morning routine and walking exercise in the afternoon routine. Environmental: I don't let food go waste into the sink. I eat left over food like a garbage can. I do gardening work once a while. Relational: my Sir husband is working on it with me in this area. Being active member in this forums is one of the way I connect with others. Aptitudinal: Help keep my Sir mental, emotional, and physical healthy so he can continue to contribute to the world.
2.你花多少时间自我关怀，以及你最喜欢的self care方式？ I don't know how much time. I think I like Systemic way the best.
3.对你的性生活有什么样的影响？ The more I take care of myself in the Systemic way, the better I can take my Sir husband's rough sex. In his time, where, and how. For example, this afternoon, when I was active on this forums, he asked me to take a nap with him on the sofa. End up my mouth, my vagina, my hands were very active on his penis and he direct me to rock on top of his body in order to give me pleasure until I need rest, then he cum on my belly. At last, we cuddle with a sound sleep together in harmony.
是有点抽象，我换一个图，更好有针对性。
这个推荐真不错！
还能拿scrub相互搓搓，按摩按摩头皮啥的。。。多么美好的生活哈。
谢谢这么好的分享，rough sex当时会enjoy但是过后会不舒服，觉得有肿胀感，略微疼痛，你有这种情况吗
这个我也有。然后就会开玩笑，baby broke my part, now excuse me, I need to regrow some cells.
真的有细胞被破坏的感觉，然后会想说为什么当时不拒绝。。。
像你这样幽默的表达比较好~
但是那个兴头上rough sex还是挺解压的. 就是不能时间太长. 很兴奋很湿润的时候其实破坏已经产生了，但是估计脑子里被happy的各种neurotransmitter刷屏，感觉不到痛。
rough sex 不等于一味的强硬。运用时如果懂刚中带柔，刚柔并重，收放恰当，就有服人降心的果效。
用刚强来表达对对手的坚定不移之激情，用柔性来抒发对对手的看顾能力，让对手感到自己可靠依偎信任。
我先用武功来做pattern上的比喻，后会用照顾新生娃娃来做比喻。
我用武功来做比喻： 武功如果用在战场上，就是一味的强硬能杀戮的功用才好用。因为战场上不是他死就是你活。 武功如果用在武艺上，就是刚柔并重艺术的展现，能向对手展示你有能力治他（她）赚取对手向你的尊重肯定，刀尖达肌肤前即止，此刻柔功上位来降伏其心，使对手败在你手下口服心服。一种无言的信息从刚中带柔的互动中向对方传达了丰厚的带有能力的爱的信息。
再用照顾新生娃娃来做比喻： 我们当过妈妈的，照顾果新生娃娃的，想想医院产护是怎么教我们包扎娃娃的？怎么抱住娃娃的？怎麼才能成功母乳餵哺的？也不就是需要刚柔并重吗？太柔保不住娃娃，给娃娃带来不安全感，太刚强会伤害到娃娃。不够刚，娃娃嘴巴总给我作对不上我乳头吸奶。这是我坚持母乳喂哺几个娃娃到十八个月大的心得经历。
我先生给我的rough sex ，就像我是个娃娃，在我先生的刚柔并重的照顾下。
为什么我有这样的心得？因为我前夫就是个只能柔不能刚的典范。我前度未婚夫就是一个刚柔并重的style。这是要对手自己带来的，别人教不了。我尝试教我前夫用我前度未婚夫的「武艺」对我刚，硬来，rough sex，结果我真给他伤到了。
后来我现任先生不单只有我前度未婚夫的rough sex style, 还更「武艺」高超。給我無比的感受他愛我的大能。
我被我前夫的只能柔不能刚 (no rough sex at all) ,我也会痛了这么多年，到了我先生那裏的那点痛，算不了甚么，起码我先生也同时带给我享受，好处胜于副作用，我认为值得。
比起在我前夫那裏，我只有痛，没有舒服过，我也咬緊牙根給他，熬了过来。我先生应当更值得我为他受这一点点痛。
原来rough sex学问这么大，感谢分享
1.以下八个维度的自我关怀，你平衡的如何？ 平衡的很好，自我测评满分
版主，我好爱你，每天上来第一件事就是来刷魅力，最近怎么没有高魅力的帖子了呢？害我攒着么多魅力想嘚瑟无处可去
边洗澡边唱歌真不错，还有其他的吗
你写一个高魅力的嘛
绝对「觉得上伊甸情园算self care」。 我先生也非常支持我上來伊甸情园分享。
我先生教了我许多自我关怀的事，教我怎么爱自己。
他还订立了我每天要做的事来自我关怀 （如果我不做，他会用教管孩子的方法来管理我）：
学日语，做瑜珈，走路（疫情时期就用家裏他添置的走路机），洗澡，吃早餐（他自己不吃，但要求我自己要做给自己吃），我自己就加上了读圣经，偶爾讀金剛經和易經。
我先生添置了许多玩具给我玩：性玩具有，烹饪玩具也有。他看到我开始在家自制面条，就买了一个自动切面条机给我。省了我很多力。 他知道我自己不会照顾自己，自理方面就像一个很乖很听话的小女孩，从来不要求别人给我甚么，也不求加添甚么来自爱。只注意别人的需要。他说我向 Fruits Basket 裏的 Honda Tohru .