Uhhh fair warning: This post is full of my anxiety and escalates really quickly as I start to just let it out. My high school is full of "jokesters" who are willing to be openly racist towards Asians and I think it might go somewhere dark. I literally got asked the other day in class "Why are you so yellow?" Same class, different day "So, what's in that lunch box? A dog?" And that was one (1) class in one (1) week. My entire fxxking school is full of "funny" white kids. We have a large Asian population (for the area), and we think the jokes are tired and rude. This isn't the only problem here. It's a school of choice, a lottery. White kids always complain about how there are too many Asians at our school, how it's unfair, how there shouldn't be so many. It makes me uncomfortable and to be honest, a little scared. In a nation of rising nationalism, how can I be sure one white boy won't take it to far and beat me up? Or my friends? My little brother? The other day I was yelled at by white kids for speaking Mandarin. They tried to force my friend to throw away her food because it "smelled funny". I heard some kid in the hall talking about how there are too many Asians in the best schools, about how that needs to change. I'm a little scared. I don't fear for my life or anything, but I fear for what this may do socially to asians-the bullying and abuse that might ensue. In a town where Trump overwhelming won, a school where edgy, "anti-PC" culture dominates, what can I do?
Uhhh fair warning: This post is full of my anxiety and escalates really quickly as I start to just let it out. My high school is full of "jokesters" who are willing to be openly racist towards Asians and I think it might go somewhere dark. I literally got asked the other day in class "Why are you so yellow?" Same class, different day "So, what's in that lunch box? A dog?" And that was one (1) class in one (1) week. My entire fxxking school is full of "funny" white kids. We have a large Asian population (for the area), and we think the jokes are tired and rude. This isn't the only problem here. It's a school of choice, a lottery. White kids always complain about how there are too many Asians at our school, how it's unfair, how there shouldn't be so many. It makes me uncomfortable and to be honest, a little scared. In a nation of rising nationalism, how can I be sure one white boy won't take it to far and beat me up? Or my friends? My little brother? The other day I was yelled at by white kids for speaking Mandarin. They tried to force my friend to throw away her food because it "smelled funny". I heard some kid in the hall talking about how there are too many Asians in the best schools, about how that needs to change. I'm a little scared. I don't fear for my life or anything, but I fear for what this may do socially to asians-the bullying and abuse that might ensue. In a town where Trump overwhelming won, a school where edgy, "anti-PC" culture dominates, what can I do?
Uhhh fair warning: This post is full of my anxiety and escalates really quickly as I start to just let it out. My high school is full of "jokesters" who are willing to be openly racist towards Asians and I think it might go somewhere dark. I literally got asked the other day in class "Why are you so yellow?" Same class, different day "So, what's in that lunch box? A dog?" And that was one (1) class in one (1) week. My entire fxxking school is full of "funny" white kids. We have a large Asian population (for the area), and we think the jokes are tired and rude. This isn't the only problem here. It's a school of choice, a lottery. White kids always complain about how there are too many Asians at our school, how it's unfair, how there shouldn't be so many. It makes me uncomfortable and to be honest, a little scared. In a nation of rising nationalism, how can I be sure one white boy won't take it to far and beat me up? Or my friends? My little brother? The other day I was yelled at by white kids for speaking Mandarin. They tried to force my friend to throw away her food because it "smelled funny". I heard some kid in the hall talking about how there are too many Asians in the best schools, about how that needs to change. I'm a little scared. I don't fear for my life or anything, but I fear for what this may do socially to asians-the bullying and abuse that might ensue. In a town where Trump overwhelming won, a school where edgy, "anti-PC" culture dominates, what can I do?
我觉得ABC,特别是男孩,跟国内的男孩子比,很多时候就是缺乏那种老子天下第一的气概,那种alpha male 的气概。当然不是说所有男孩子都应该有这样的气概,甚至很多时候这种气概也是盲目的甚至可笑的。但是一直作为少数民族长大的男孩子,就是会比较难有那种作为主流民族男性称王称霸或者说要给社会这个国家当家作主的想法。虽然说这样的想法或气概大部分是空洞幼稚,对日常生活毫无用处。但是想了没用和完全不想还是有很大区别的。
我觉得ABC,特别是男孩,跟国内的男孩子比,很多时候就是缺乏那种老子天下第一的气概,那种alpha male 的气概。当然不是说所有男孩子都应该有这样的气概,甚至很多时候这种气概也是盲目的甚至可笑的。但是一直作为少数民族长大的男孩子,就是会比较难有那种作为主流民族男性称王称霸或者说要给社会这个国家当家作主的想法。虽然说这样的想法或气概大部分是空洞幼稚,对日常生活毫无用处。但是想了没用和完全不想还是有很大区别的。
说的好,家长首先要勇敢,直面问题,才能去解决问题。
像这楼里的一些人,就知道一切甩锅给党妈给厉害国,对实际问题一点裨益都没有。
我们家长能不能更多的突破自己在美国所遇到的局限?
能不能更好的帮助孩子?
这些讨论才是有意义的。
从前的留学生大多回国了,所以不存在我们讨论的在美二代的困境问题。
那几个叫嚣国内如何歧视的,其实是在搅浑水,我们在这讨论孩子成长的问题,不是广泛的社会不公现象。
即使在一个非常dencent的环境,亚裔也会因为生物种族因素,被边缘绿叶化,这是我们关注的焦点。
如何改变帮助我们的孩子,这才是有意义的。
“不少”应该改为99.99%, 族群里应包括亚裔。
在美国绝大多数就是普通老百姓,干着普通的活,丰衣足食。
待在厉害国就变得不普通了?
你说的没错,不过那个不知道兄说的也没错。对abc的压制,客观上是存在的,这点不能否认。但是我们也不能教育孩子养成victim mentality,就跟黑人一样,把所有的问题都归结于种族歧视。用老毛的话说,战略上要藐视敌人,战术上要重视敌人。一方面要面对现实,另一方面要教育abc娃娃们形成积极的向上的,而不是怨天尤人的精神。我的观察,很重要的一点是要在一个华人占主导的环境下长大,这样才不容易被边缘化。另外父母的心态也很重要,言传身教。
厉害国没有公民权,哪来的公民?
移民美国很难,回国却是很容易。
别管人家说啥,你看一下都在做啥就行了。
没看到你说了什么怎么帮助abc,通篇就看到你各种埋汰挖苦鄙视abc,在你看来帮助abc最有效的方式就是父母海归,呵呵。 ---发自Huaren 官方 iOS APP
确实有这个现象。一代虽然语言文化都不行,但是勇猛多了。
这么看就太狭隘了,不能说凡是说中国好的都是5毛。而且这文也不是说中国好,而是人在母族更容易成功。
你是觉得你在10亿和你一样刻苦玩命的人里面比较容易“成功”
在3亿憨吃傻玩的人里面比较不容易“成功” 是吧。
你就直说你英语四级没过,那么难么?
国内那10亿人跟你还真没关系,都是农民。pk的无非是精英层。能出国的家里父母多半就已经是精英层了。
感觉加州纽约比较容易做到
这种不抱怨自信的态度是在一个有利的成长环境培养出来的。性格从来不是凭空而降的,而是深受环境影响的。一个人从来被边缘化的小孩很难培养出自信的性格。现在讨论的就是美国对华裔小孩的成长环境。
关键是很多人都回不去了。包括国籍问题什么的。楼主贴这个贴也不是希望贬低abc吧,因为这种现象确实存在,大家可以建设性的探讨一下解决方法啊。
不是从小学,但确实听说过提拔华裔到比较高的位置公司hr会被美国政府部门约谈小心的
你认为你说的能对这个女孩有所帮助吗?https://www.reddit.com/r/asianamerican/comments/a4qh0i/guys_im_a_little_scared/
r/asianamerican•Posted byu/FriedRiceGirl
1 day ago
Guys, im a little scared.
Uhhh fair warning: This post is full of my anxiety and escalates really quickly as I start to just let it out. My high school is full of "jokesters" who are willing to be openly racist towards Asians and I think it might go somewhere dark. I literally got asked the other day in class "Why are you so yellow?" Same class, different day "So, what's in that lunch box? A dog?" And that was one (1) class in one (1) week. My entire fxxking school is full of "funny" white kids. We have a large Asian population (for the area), and we think the jokes are tired and rude. This isn't the only problem here. It's a school of choice, a lottery. White kids always complain about how there are too many Asians at our school, how it's unfair, how there shouldn't be so many. It makes me uncomfortable and to be honest, a little scared. In a nation of rising nationalism, how can I be sure one white boy won't take it to far and beat me up? Or my friends? My little brother? The other day I was yelled at by white kids for speaking Mandarin. They tried to force my friend to throw away her food because it "smelled funny". I heard some kid in the hall talking about how there are too many Asians in the best schools, about how that needs to change. I'm a little scared. I don't fear for my life or anything, but I fear for what this may do socially to asians-the bullying and abuse that might ensue. In a town where Trump overwhelming won, a school where edgy, "anti-PC" culture dominates, what can I do?
re。。。。。。。。
歧视无所不在,很多华人家长还说自己小孩没有受到歧视,bla,bla,bla...
华人川粉们应该看看这个。话说有什么解决办法吗?如果是她的父母。估计她父母也不知道
这里厉害的abc多了去了,你在美国呆过吗? ---发自Huaren 官方 iOS APP
看那几个发帖的就知道了,都是闭门造车,道听途说的主。
不是百分百这样,也有在刻板印象之下仍旧闪亮的华裔孩子,但是难度高得多得多了。
这两天看了很多,也想了很多。既然大环境已经如此,怨天尤人后悔来美国都不是办法了啊。可以做的:
1)从小多和不同族裔,包括白人,多多的social ,尽量的get comfortable with social activities: 这个其实对孩子不难,孩子越小越容易。对于不是特别喜欢social的父母会比较难一点。
2)随着孩子长大,更多的选择亚裔文化有存在感的大环境居住和学习。譬如初中以后,选择对学习比较看重的学区学校,有比较多亚裔文化存在感的学校。找自己比较有优势的方面让孩子尽可能多突出一点。
3)学中文,回国多接触比较正面的环境,对于自身的华裔背景建立认同感和自豪感。同时也多接触和欣赏各族文化,建立diversity 的观念。
4)家庭环境:正面积极,多陪伴,多夸赞
5)政治上,在左右之间合理摇摆。现在社会太左了没咱活路。右起来一样可怕。
6)如果遇到歧视和挫折的时候,淡定,化愤怒为动力
还有啥可以做的。。。?
孩子小的时候真的都很SWEET。越大就越来越像一个小社会了。
这个问题我一直有。但是一直没有答案
用赵小兰的话来说,就是要让美国人尊重亚裔文化,同时亚裔还能够担任领导者的位置,并不是用你所谓的放弃自己文化,全身心投入美国文化才是融入。不过她个人的经验不见得多容易复制。
一代美国华人里脚踩两条船的太多了,全身心投入比其它民族差多了。
现在在国内光聪明和成绩好也不见得是同学的中心 ---发自Huaren 官方 iOS APP
说的不错,我觉得这楼里有些奇怪的鸵鸟,可能和wumao类似,美分型的,前者是见不得人说中国半点不好,后者是见不得人说美国半个字不对,谁说跟谁急,跳脚甩大帽子,别以为这两类人不一样,其实是一丘之貉。
其实这帖子挺好,帮助ABC的家长们正视现实,想出一些积极有益的办法。
这样的讨论应该多多益善,比偏面的爬藤攻略强,毕竟藤校不过是人生中的一个阶段,不是终极目标。
补充一下:层主说的 6)如果遇到歧视和挫折的时候,淡定,化愤怒为动力
说点不同观点,在遇到歧视的时候,还是要学会有理有利有节智慧的斗争,不能一味的化XX为XX。不然,华裔好欺负的帽子就永远也摘不掉。
本来长着‘中国脸不会说一句中文就是很尴尬啊。这个作者七岁才来的美国不会说一句中文只能说不光父母失败自己也很差劲吧。能进藤校的孩子,相信他除了英文外还有一门外语呢。拿出学二外的精力来学中文怎么就不会呢。还不如说这一代人站错了队伍,ABC成长时中国还是受鄙视的不值得花时间精力学中文,到了长大投行工作了,中国市场客户都很吸引,又后悔没有中文不好了。其实是他羡慕那些从中国过来的家庭背景雄厚的小留吧。他以为如果父母不来美国,他就能跟那些小留一样么。在美国大金融公司混得好的至少国内家庭都很有人脉的,他羡慕的就是那些国内的人脉吧。他怎么不想想人家别说是高官子女,至少也是个什么城市的银行行长的儿子吧。他父母不出国就能有这样的地位吗
我觉得ABC,特别是男孩,跟国内的男孩子比,很多时候就是缺乏那种老子天下第一的气概,那种alpha male 的气概。当然不是说所有男孩子都应该有这样的气概,甚至很多时候这种气概也是盲目的甚至可笑的。但是一直作为少数民族长大的男孩子,就是会比较难有那种作为主流民族男性称王称霸或者说要给社会这个国家当家作主的想法。虽然说这样的想法或气概大部分是空洞幼稚,对日常生活毫无用处。但是想了没用和完全不想还是有很大区别的。
对,就是alpha male的那种气概,
男孩子们,这种气概很重要,虽然这种气概在一个群体里本来也是正太分布,不是人人拥有。可到了美国的亚裔们,却少之又少。
女娃们不能成为主角,也还有灰姑娘的传说
灰王子的故事可是从来都没有的,永远不能成为主角,对孩子们的心理影响性格培养很大。