A letter to the class of 25 from an ivy league dropout
Dear Class of 25 and onward,
As many decisions roll out and many people here decide where they will spend the next four years of their lives, I want to share an important lesson I learned. To introduce myself, I'm currently a freshman at a nearby community college in Southern California (LA), a high school class of 2024. I come from a lower middle class income family and a strictly Asian(Japanese) background where many of my relatives went to "elite" universities in the US and Japan.
Last year around this time, I got into Princeton, which was my dream school. I cried out of joy when I opened the decision, and my parents also teared up because I got a full ride. I was the salutatorian of my high school, and I had pretty much all A's with a 4.7 GPA and 1580 SAT and 31 ACT. At the time, I felt like I was on top of the world, and to this day I cannot explain how happy I was when I opened my decision. I had other choices such as Berkeley, UCLA, Duke, USC, Boston University, Dartmouth, and a few other schools with a lot of recognition. As Princeton was the number one school on many college ranking websites and the brand had incredible recognition worldwide wide plus the full ride, it was a no-brainer for me to pick Princeton.
When I arrived at Princeton, all my expectations were different. I failed almost all my classes I was taking, I was not able to make any friends, and all the academic pressure and prestige crushed my mental health. I lied to my parents about doing well and about having a lot of friends at Princeton because they had a lot of expectations of me and did not want them to worry about my academics as well as my social life there. As my mental health got worse and worse, I had thoughts about killing myself and just ending it all. This, combined with my failing relationship, which I was putting too much time, money, and thoughts into, completely destroyed my mental health, and I was at the point where my friends from home called an ambulance for me, and I was hospitalized. Because of the combination of a failed relationship (breakup) and my poor academic and mental health during my stay at Princeton, I dropped out after 1 semester without my parents' approval or anyone's approval but mine.
**What can other people learn from my experience?**
If I were to go back in time, I would tell myself to pick a school where I actually felt comfortable instead of picking prestige and reputation over anything, and I would tell anyone in the world that's trying to decide what school they should go to the same thing. Because I prioritized the "wrong" requirements for me to pick a school, I now struggle with depression from my experience at Princeton, a failed relationship with my now ex, and a sour relationship with my parents that formed after I dropped out of Princeton.
My main advice to the class of 25 and forward is that I want them to know that these schools are extremely selective for a reason. There is a reason why many students with 4.0 GPAs get rejected. Not just Princeton but the Ivy League and many other selective schools are like that because they require a certain type of people with unique goals and personalities to succeed at those schools. I mainly attended Princeton because of the name brand and the networking opportunity, but a lot of people I interacted with were entrepreneurs, world leaders, and had incredible talents. These people are trying to change the world for the better and compared to that, my reason for attending Princeton sounds like nothing. If you want to attend, you should have a REAL reason, not just because of the Ivy League brand name.
Picking a school is super easy, it's just putting a deposit and a single click, but that decision can cost you everything. I currently have depression, and other lifelong scars on my heart. If I could go back in time, I 100% would. *I don't want anyone to go through the same experience as me and suffer like what I am going through* right now, which is why I decided to post this, and I'm just trying to find people to hangout together near my area if they are willing to because my wish for myself is to heal as soon as possible from my wound and make new friends.
每次看到这种故事我都感慨：也许熊娃选择做“仰卧起坐”娃是有他的智慧的，只有在他认为最重要的事情上他才会用全力，大部分时候都是good enough is good enough，这样基本不会出现burn out的情况，偶尔掉了链子也可以阿Q的告诉自己：我还有潜力可以挖掘 所以他才能在割喉公校保持每天八个半小时的睡眠，看上去总是阳光灿烂的样子。
A letter to the class of 25 from an ivy league dropout
Dear Class of 25 and onward,
As many decisions roll out and many people here decide where they will spend the next four years of their lives, I want to share an important lesson I learned. To introduce myself, I'm currently a freshman at a nearby community college in Southern California (LA), a high school class of 2024. I come from a lower middle class income family and a strictly Asian(Japanese) background where many of my relatives went to "elite" universities in the US and Japan.
Last year around this time, I got into Princeton, which was my dream school. I cried out of joy when I opened the decision, and my parents also teared up because I got a full ride. I was the salutatorian of my high school, and I had pretty much all A's with a 4.7 GPA and 1580 SAT and 31 ACT. At the time, I felt like I was on top of the world, and to this day I cannot explain how happy I was when I opened my decision. I had other choices such as Berkeley, UCLA, Duke, USC, Boston University, Dartmouth, and a few other schools with a lot of recognition. As Princeton was the number one school on many college ranking websites and the brand had incredible recognition worldwide wide plus the full ride, it was a no-brainer for me to pick Princeton.
When I arrived at Princeton, all my expectations were different. I failed almost all my classes I was taking, I was not able to make any friends, and all the academic pressure and prestige crushed my mental health. I lied to my parents about doing well and about having a lot of friends at Princeton because they had a lot of expectations of me and did not want them to worry about my academics as well as my social life there. As my mental health got worse and worse, I had thoughts about killing myself and just ending it all. This, combined with my failing relationship, which I was putting too much time, money, and thoughts into, completely destroyed my mental health, and I was at the point where my friends from home called an ambulance for me, and I was hospitalized. Because of the combination of a failed relationship (breakup) and my poor academic and mental health during my stay at Princeton, I dropped out after 1 semester without my parents' approval or anyone's approval but mine.
**What can other people learn from my experience?**
If I were to go back in time, I would tell myself to pick a school where I actually felt comfortable instead of picking prestige and reputation over anything, and I would tell anyone in the world that's trying to decide what school they should go to the same thing. Because I prioritized the "wrong" requirements for me to pick a school, I now struggle with depression from my experience at Princeton, a failed relationship with my now ex, and a sour relationship with my parents that formed after I dropped out of Princeton.
My main advice to the class of 25 and forward is that I want them to know that these schools are extremely selective for a reason. There is a reason why many students with 4.0 GPAs get rejected. Not just Princeton but the Ivy League and many other selective schools are like that because they require a certain type of people with unique goals and personalities to succeed at those schools. I mainly attended Princeton because of the name brand and the networking opportunity, but a lot of people I interacted with were entrepreneurs, world leaders, and had incredible talents. These people are trying to change the world for the better and compared to that, my reason for attending Princeton sounds like nothing. If you want to attend, you should have a REAL reason, not just because of the Ivy League brand name.
Picking a school is super easy, it's just putting a deposit and a single click, but that decision can cost you everything. I currently have depression, and other lifelong scars on my heart. If I could go back in time, I 100% would. *I don't want anyone to go through the same experience as me and suffer like what I am going through* right now, which is why I decided to post this, and I'm just trying to find people to hangout together near my area if they are willing to because my wish for myself is to heal as soon as possible from my wound and make new friends.
Thank you,
KN
Penn跳楼的。那个孩子可惜了。好像是个挺上进的黑人男生。跟不上就是跟不上，就想不开了。
每次看到这种故事我都感慨：也许熊娃选择做“仰卧起坐”娃是有他的智慧的，只有在他认为最重要的事情上他才会用全力，大部分时候都是good enough is good enough，这样基本不会出现burn out的情况，偶尔掉了链子也可以阿Q的告诉自己：我还有潜力可以挖掘
所以他才能在割喉公校保持每天八个半小时的睡眠，看上去总是阳光灿烂的样子。
是学校历史上GPA 最高毕业的。另一个是德州小白男， premed，所有premed 有关的课在大一都没过， 孩子很坚定的要读医，当时的说法是大二的时候要把没过的课重修个遍。这个还不是紫檀上割喉的学校， 孩子离家上学， 要适应学校环境， 孩子们也不容易。
等两小娃都上了高中再看到底是个人性格还是系统的效果。目前看他俩比哥哥小时候自推多了，要是两个天生自推娃到了高中也变成了“仰卧起坐”娃，那么很有可能是系统的作用。
我两年后也选择了DROPOUT。当然我是移民，读的是博士，我有很多功课之外的考量。选择远远不是click a button和别人听到你读的学校的一声wow(国人为主
)，要求你真的比较了解你自己选择的路上的好与坏。还好我的教训为孩子们避开了坑。
经过一系列血的教训，不让休学后来自杀，校方现在让步的。他不是混上去的，底子在，就是适应问题。大学阶段，一步跟不上步步跟不上。他没有父母支持，这是最关键的，因此仓促做决定，回不去了。CC州大不见得容易，所以傻了，这孩子！
井底之蛙。原来天那么大啊
还有原有期望和现实的巨大落差产生的精神压力综合一起才是quit的主要原因。还有一点他提到，周围同学和自己的理想的格格不入，这点我当年是有体会的，那种孤独感对精神健康绝对非常不利。
其实这孩子从这次经历总结的教训还是很好的，应该为他以后的生活做出的更好的选择。