Change the way we look at things, the things we look at CHANGE
I feel your pain deeply. Before I was stuck where you are at, distancing my kids furthere and further byChinese-style parenting, was not able to figure out what went wrong. Stronly recommendyou to try landmark forum course which changed the lens through which I view life. Change the way we look at things, the things we look at CHANGE - Wayne Dyer.I have gained much more peace and calmness through this transformation. Most of all, I am getting my relationship back with my family. Your son is perfect the way he is, showing your unconditional love will calm him down and give him room to grow. Wish you best luck!!!
这是个非常犟的孩子，和我老大比较像。很难管。我的体会是:1、良好的亲子关系，无条件的爱。
2、不发脾气、但做错事给后果。什么事情有后果?选几个 底线的事情 这些没有协商余地;比如 尊重家人、做好作业、做好份内家务。其他事情先不管。
3、定好的consequence不退缩，要坚定执行
4、如果孩子态度好，有时具体执行可以协商、也就是我们也尊重孩子的想法，make sure they are heard.
以上摔大人手机坚决不可接受。
如你们决定不可带书去、他一定要带的话，不要生气，和他商量、但你们决定给他一个后果好了 比如学习成绩要在多少以上。因为他的任务就是学习。
教养青少年推荐一本书: Parenting Teens with Love and Logic by Foster Cline. 这本书是很多青少年心理辅导师推荐给家长的，有很多实例，很有帮助。那些例子里都是很难搞的青少年
I feel your pain deeply. Before I was stuck where you are at, distancing my kids furthere and further byChinese-style parenting, was not able to figure out what went wrong. Stronly recommendyou to try landmark forum course which changed the lens through which I view life. Change the way we look at things, the things we look at CHANGE - Wayne Dyer.I have gained much more peace and calmness through this transformation. Most of all, I am getting my relationship back with my family. Your son is perfect the way he is, showing your unconditional love will calm him down and give him room to grow. Wish you best luck!!!
简直就和我家儿子一样一样的， 读闲书上瘾， 眼镜600多度，还好是他嘴上不会那么倔，以前是上课看， 其他作业上课都马马虎虎，我是一哭2闹3上吊的招都使过。 进入8年级，有点懂事了， 不敢不交作业了， 我也给他找到一位年轻的补习老师， 很说的来，听那老师的话， 终于成绩都在A或B，刚考上重点高中。他也知道我都是为他好， 如果我不逼他， 他都没有资格考重点高中。孩子在慢慢成长，想办法让他尝到成功的甜头，他会理解的， 还有，能找到一个和他交心的导师很重要。你想想办法吧
他会说课堂上别人也在做别的事，看别的书，老师允许的。就像学校里不允许用手机，但还是有人带到课堂上去。不过，我确实还是需要耐心的跟他谈，也认识到了，耐心跟他磨才是我的唯一出路。