English is actually my first language and Chinese is hardly my second, thanks to being a mixed ABC. Regarding your doubt about my using "dawn" as a verb, just look it up online. Honestly, I was a bit taken aback by your friendly query. Anyway, I keep my fingers crossed that Memorial Day will dawn bright and beautiful.
You used it correctly in "...Memorial Day will dawn bright and beautiful". In "Free Verse for a Free Spirit", however, you were clearly using it as a transitive verb by giving it an object in "my world." Unless you can claim poetic license, you are wrong in your usage. I doubt your being a native speaker of English can in any way change this fact.
always so supportive. I also like the ci poem better. As for the recital, I was fortunate enough to have a Chinese student from that college as a volunteer. She was a bit nervous at the beginning. Very soon she found her groove. There's a rhythm, I believe, to what she did. BTW, she let me know that she thought I was the wrong person when she saw me. Then, I spoke and she smiled instantly behind her mask.
原創《摸魚兒》靖康國難
渡江來、任蓑迎淚，天涯天雨天暮。
六朝山水歸南宋，王謝燕歌如故。
難獨窹，又獨唸、國殤千古招魂賦；
靈均句句，
付十指塵間、七弦燭下，彈到寸灰處。
杭州曉，柳拂西湖幾度，蒼生浮魄無數。
低頭不若抬頭好，飛墨一行春鷺。
春鷺去，瘦筆點、家家肥綠桑槐樹；
蔭孺蔭嫗。
問半壁男兒、誰堪北望？誰斷汴州路？
譜據龍榆生《摸魚兒》定格
韻從《詞林正韻》第四部去聲
A Free Verse for a Free Spirit
In her time,
No well-bred girl’s feet had to be bound.
In her dream,
She just ran up to the moon,
Only to parachute with Chang-e’s sleeves.
Home safe, she slept on and on,
Only to rise early enough
To beat the rooster,
Singing the first note to dawn my world.
In my world,
She kept swinging high,
Kicking up her feet even higher
And higher
Until her shoes flew off
As a pair of swallows,
Shadow-dancing,
Tweeting
Through and between
My first and last lines.
—— Lingyang Jiang
深蒙一位隱名詩友支持，朗誦李清照《聲聲慢》，鳴謝！
尋尋覓覓，冷冷清清，淒淒慘慘戚戚。乍暖還寒時候，最難將息。三盃兩盞淡酒，怎敵他晚來風急！雁過也，正傷心，卻是舊時相識。
滿地黃花堆積。憔悴損，如今有誰堪摘？守著窗兒，獨自怎生得黑。梧桐更兼細雨，到黃昏，點點滴滴。這次第，怎一個愁字了得！
關於李清照生平，筆者不贅，願薦以下兩篇文章供大家參考：
《真實的李清照》
https://kknews.cc/culture/gzeazj8.html
“Awakening and Existence of Female Consciousness within Li Qingzhao’s Ci Poems”
https://www.auessays.com/essays/literature/awakening-and-existence-of-female-consciousness-within-li-qingzhaos-ci-poems.php
不过又想起日前才有网友在文学城刊文讲，其收集的某名人之后家谱明确记载，岳飞系秦桧两次矫诏后下狱害死的。其实没高宗默许，秦桧哪敢如此。所以断汴州路的嘛......
那Free Verse读来真的好轻松，字里行间洋溢 ”自由“ 气息，喜欢！ 诗朗诵也棒极了！
一个小小疑问：不知 poetic license 是否允许 dawn 做及物动词用。也许可换成 usher in?
魯迅早就說過南宋高宗為鞏其半壁江山、圓其偏安帝夢，豈容徽欽二宗回駕？中國帝皇慣於諉過於（一）臣子、（二）妃子。
English is actually my first language and Chinese is hardly my second, thanks to being a mixed ABC. Regarding your doubt about my using "dawn" as a verb, just look it up online. Honestly, I was a bit taken aback by your friendly query. Anyway, I keep my fingers crossed that Memorial Day will dawn bright and beautiful.
I shoot straight.
is clearly listed only as an intransitive verb.
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/dawn
Here is anther dictionary. It says "dawn", as a verb, should be used "without object".
https://www.dictionary.com/browse/dawn
You used it correctly in "...Memorial Day will dawn bright and beautiful". In "Free Verse for a Free Spirit", however, you were clearly using it as a transitive verb by giving it an object in "my world." Unless you can claim poetic license, you are wrong in your usage. I doubt your being a native speaker of English can in any way change this fact.
I shoot straight, too.
shooting straight with me. I apologize. No, I am not going to claim any poetic license. Your comments will stay here because they should.
I like the Chinese one even better. :) It's beautiful, especially the second half. Love it!
The poem recital is very nice too. Beautiful voice!
always so supportive. I also like the ci poem better. As for the recital, I was fortunate enough to have a Chinese student from that college as a volunteer. She was a bit nervous at the beginning. Very soon she found her groove. There's a rhythm, I believe, to what she did. BTW, she let me know that she thought I was the wrong person when she saw me. Then, I spoke and she smiled instantly behind her mask.