一、爱情与婚姻 Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed. 男人结婚是因为厌倦，女人结婚是因为好奇；两者最后都失望。
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. 婚姻是想象力战胜智慧的胜利。第二次婚姻是希望战胜经验的胜利。
Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. 爱情是盲目的，但婚姻是真的大开眼界。
No man ever commits a sin while his wife is present. 妻子面前，男人无罪可犯。
二、人生与虚伪 The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. 摆脱诱惑的唯一方法就是屈服于它。
I can resist everything except temptation. 我能抵抗一切，除了诱惑。
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. 我们都在阴沟里，但仍有人仰望星空。
To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all. 活着是世界上最稀有的事情。大多数人只是生存，仅此而已。
三、社交与道德 One should never trust a woman who tells one her real age. A woman who tells one that would tell one anything. 永远不要相信告诉你自己真实年龄的女人。一个敢这么说的女人，什么都敢告诉你。
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much. 总是原谅你的敌人；没有什么比这更让他们恼火的。
四、财富与名利 There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about. 世界上唯一比被闲言碎语更糟糕的事，就是没人谈论你。
The one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties. 婚姻的唯一魅力在于，它让双方都必须生活在谎言中。
五、死亡与存在 Life is too important to be taken seriously. 生活太重要，不能认真对待。
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go. 有些人，无论走到哪里，都能带来幸福；有些人，只要他们离开，就皆大欢喜。
I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best. 我的品味很简单。只要是最好的，我就满足。
六、艺术与美 Art is the most intense mode of individualism that the world has known. 艺术是世界上最强烈的个人主义表现。
Beauty is the most important thing in life. There is nothing more important than beauty. 美是生活中最重要的东西。世上没有什么比美更重要。
An artist is the creator of beautiful things. A critic is one who can’t create, but who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing. 艺术家是美的创造者。评论家是自己不能创造，却知道一切事物的价格，但不知道任何东西的价值。
王尔德“一度”是是英国最风光的作家和社交名流，但因一场丑闻被判入狱。服刑两年后，他身败名裂，身无分文。出狱后，他独自流落到巴黎，寄宿在一家破旅馆里，卧病在床，一天到晚面对墙上丑陋的破壁纸。临终前，他实在是忍无可忍，说：“Either that wallpaper goes, or I do.”——“要么墙纸走，要么我走。”
我喜欢奥斯卡·王尔德（Oscar Wilde）。他集机智、毒舌、哲思和浪漫于一身，是讽刺文学大师。
以下是挂一漏万的王尔德幽默语录：
一、爱情与婚姻
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
男人结婚是因为厌倦，女人结婚是因为好奇；两者最后都失望。
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
婚姻是想象力战胜智慧的胜利。第二次婚姻是希望战胜经验的胜利。
Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
爱情是盲目的，但婚姻是真的大开眼界。
No man ever commits a sin while his wife is present.
妻子面前，男人无罪可犯。
二、人生与虚伪
The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
摆脱诱惑的唯一方法就是屈服于它。
I can resist everything except temptation.
我能抵抗一切，除了诱惑。
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
我们都在阴沟里，但仍有人仰望星空。
To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.
活着是世界上最稀有的事情。大多数人只是生存，仅此而已。
三、社交与道德
One should never trust a woman who tells one her real age. A woman who tells one that would tell one anything.
永远不要相信告诉你自己真实年龄的女人。一个敢这么说的女人，什么都敢告诉你。
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
总是原谅你的敌人；没有什么比这更让他们恼火的。
四、财富与名利
There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.
世界上唯一比被闲言碎语更糟糕的事，就是没人谈论你。
The one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties.
婚姻的唯一魅力在于，它让双方都必须生活在谎言中。
五、死亡与存在
Life is too important to be taken seriously.
生活太重要，不能认真对待。
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
有些人，无论走到哪里，都能带来幸福；有些人，只要他们离开，就皆大欢喜。
I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best.
我的品味很简单。只要是最好的，我就满足。
六、艺术与美
Art is the most intense mode of individualism that the world has known.
艺术是世界上最强烈的个人主义表现。
Beauty is the most important thing in life. There is nothing more important than beauty.
美是生活中最重要的东西。世上没有什么比美更重要。
An artist is the creator of beautiful things. A critic is one who can’t create, but who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.
艺术家是美的创造者。评论家是自己不能创造，却知道一切事物的价格，但不知道任何东西的价值。
王尔德“一度”是是英国最风光的作家和社交名流，但因一场丑闻被判入狱。服刑两年后，他身败名裂，身无分文。出狱后，他独自流落到巴黎，寄宿在一家破旅馆里，卧病在床，一天到晚面对墙上丑陋的破壁纸。临终前，他实在是忍无可忍，说：“Either that wallpaper goes, or I do.”——“要么墙纸走，要么我走。”
这是我去年秋天在旧金山 Castro 小区路面上照到滴：
小的时候，看见语录，小心地想：
只要多写几篇文章，
或者，写上一本甚至几本书，
只要不是胡说八道，
总有几句有道理的，
可以编个语录啥的。。。
。。。
哈哈，好在小心，谁也没告诉！~~
。。。
现在可以粗心一点？
那么，
一起来写我们的笑坛语录吧，
看谁写的最搞笑、最捣乱、最开心、最闹心。。。
那谁、谁、和谁，
我看好你！~~
"The sounds of silence":
很美的一首诗：
不信点开下面看 ：