My sons both came back to visit me this year. They quarantined at home for two weeks, then spent another two weeks at home.
They are paying their rent at the their own places + air travel cost + loss their freedom for two weeks just to see parents. I am actually deeply moved.
Everyone is on different schedule. One is on East Coast working schedule, one is on West Coast late working schedule. So from 8:00 pm - 8: am No noise. Shower in the bathroom next to the garage. Eat whenever hungry. Order take-out yourself if don't like the food. Everyone is at ease.
One son went to visit his girlfriend. He spent a month at the girlfriend's house. He preferred to stay at the hotel, but the concern was when the girlfriend came to visit him, she might carry the CODIV virus home, and got her parents exposed to the virus. So in a way, they made the sacrifice of their freedom for the love of parents. Young generation pay less concern to the cost, because they never had to worry about money like us.
So set the house rule, just relax. They may not want to stay at home for this long if it is not due to COVID.
如果是俺会这样处理：
1）首先与你娃沟通：看他和女友发展到了哪一步？如果只是男女朋友没有目标结婚（至少订婚的意向），那就果断拒绝。不能阿猫阿狗都往家里带！（这是俺家订下的规矩，因为家里娃多，这样的口子一开，到时会应付不过来
）。如果你娃表示的确有发展到婚姻的那一步，就敞开大门欢迎，这毕竟是增进双方感情和了解的一次难得的机会！
2）与对方家长沟通：了解一下她家人的态度和concern。毕竟让对方感到尊重，同时显示你们也不是那种随便的家庭.
3）找自己的律师起草一份免责条款。
4）与女友直接沟通一次（不要间接转达）。了解一下她的生活习惯，有什么个别的要求，尽量满足。当面表达你们全家欢迎她。会把她当自己的女儿一样对待。
5）入住第一天把免责条款和家里对子女的书面规矩一起签了。
6）遇到任何矛盾一定要做到只批评儿子，有进步一定要两人一起表扬
7）结婚之前两人应该各自安排一个房间，这是表达你家的态度，同时也是对女友及其家人的尊重。至于sex相信他们会自己安排好的。
8）LZ特别提到做饭的问题，一般女孩的饭量不大，物理上差别不大。但若以伺候人的心态出发，心理上冲击则很大。LZ应该适当调整
。建议试行平日欢迎他们加入家里人一起吃饭，周末有他们小两口为全家做饭。这样也可以让他们体会一下做饭的不易，同时磨练一下基本生活技能。
My sons both came back to visit me this year. They quarantined at home for two weeks, then spent another two weeks at home.
They are paying their rent at the their own places + air travel cost + loss their freedom for two weeks just to see parents. I am actually deeply moved.
Everyone is on different schedule. One is on East Coast working schedule, one is on West Coast late working schedule. So from 8:00 pm - 8: am No noise. Shower in the bathroom next to the garage. Eat whenever hungry. Order take-out yourself if don't like the food. Everyone is at ease.
One son went to visit his girlfriend. He spent a month at the girlfriend's house. He preferred to stay at the hotel, but the concern was when the girlfriend came to visit him, she might carry the CODIV virus home, and got her parents exposed to the virus. So in a way, they made the sacrifice of their freedom for the love of parents. Young generation pay less concern to the cost, because they never had to worry about money like us.
So set the house rule, just relax. They may not want to stay at home for this long if it is not due to COVID.
不方便的。家里要是还有小小孩，那更不好了。
那时就住在给她准备的自己的房间里，我还有个Dementia妈妈要照顾，因为这个病毒她也回不了中国，所以怕照顾不过来。
我朋友的女儿就跟她男朋友家住一起。她男朋友家有４个小孩. 他们家把她当家人对待。没有任何问题。