回复 2楼Cumberbitch的帖子 Judy Brady著名的文章：I Want a Wife 1- I belong to that classification of people known as wives. I am A Wife. And, not altogether incidentally, I am a mother. 2- Not too long ago a male friend of mine appeared on the scene fresh from a recent divorce. He had one child, who is, of course, with his ex-wife. He is looking for another wife. As I thought about him while I was ironing one evening, it suddenly occurred to me that 1, too, would like to have a wife. Why do I want a wife? 3- I would like to go back to school so that I can become economically independent, support myself, and, if need be, support those dependent upon me. I want a wife who will work and send me to school. And while I am going to school, I want a wife to take care of my children. I want a wife to keep track of the children''s doctor and dentist appointments. And to keep track of mine, too. I want a wife to make sure my children eat properly and are kept clean. I want a wife who will wash the children''s clothes and keep them mended. I want a wife who is a good nurturant attendant to my children, who arranges for their schooling, makes sure that they have an adequate social life with their peers, takes them to the park, the zoo, etc. I want a wife who takes care of the children when they are sick, a wife who arranges to be around when the children need special care, because, of course, I cannot miss classes at school. My wife must arrange to lose time at work and not lose the job. It may mean a small cut in my wife''s income from time to time, but I guess I can tolerate that. Needless to say, my wife will arrange and pay for the care of the children while my wife is working. 4- I want a wife who will take care of my physical needs. I want a wife who will keep my house clean. A wife who will pick up after my children, a wife who will pick up after me. I want a wife who will keep my clothes clean, ironed, mended, replaced when need be, and who will see to it that my personal things are kept in their proper place so that I can find what I need the minute I need it. I want a wife who cooks the meals, a wife who is a good cook. I want a wife who will plan the menus, do the necessary grocery shopping, prepare the meals, serve them pleasantly, and then do the cleaning up while I do my studying. I want a wife who will care for me when I am sick and sympathize with my pain and loss of time from school. I want a wife to go along when our family takes a vacation so that someone can continue to care for me and my children when I need a rest and change of scene. 5- I want a wife who will not bother me with rambling complaints about a wife''s duties. But I want a wife who will listen to me when I feel the need to explain a rather difficult point I have come across in my course studies. And I want a wife who will type my papers for me when I have written them. 6- I want a wife who will take care of the details of my social life. When my wife and I are invited out by my friends, I want a wife who will take care of the baby-sitting arrangements. When I meet people at school that I like and want to entertain, I want a wife who will have the house clean, will prepare a special meal, serve it to me and my friends, and not interrupt when I talk about things that interest me and my friends. I want a wife who will have arranged that the children are fed and ready for bed before my guests arrive so that the children do not bother us. I want a wife who takes care of the needs of my guests so that they feel comfortable, who makes sure that they have an ashtray, that they are passed the hors d''oeuvres, that they are offered a second helping of the food, that their wine glasses are replenished when necessary, that their coffee is served to them as they like it. And I want a wife who knows that sometimes I need a night out by myself. 7- I want a wife who is sensitive to my sexual needs, a wife who makes love passionately and eagerly when I feel like it, a wife who makes sure that I am satisfied. And, of course, I want a wife who will not demand sexual attention when I am not in the mood for it. I want a wife who assumes the complete responsibility for birth control, because I do not want more children. I want a wife who will remain sexually faithful to me so that I do not have to clutter up my intellectual life with jealousies. And I want a wife who understands that my sexual needs may entail more than strict adherence to monogamy. I must, after all, be able to relate to people as fully as possible. 8- If, by chance, I find another person more suitable as a wife than the wife I already have, I want the liberty to replace my present wife with another one. Naturally, I will expect a fresh, new life; my wife will take the children and be solely responsible for them so that I am left free. 9- When I am through with school and have a job, I want my wife to quit working and remain at home so that my wife can more fully and completely take care of a wife''s duties. 10- My God, who wouldn''t want a wife?
绝大多少男人也”不过就是一张paycheck“，so？这一点都不妨碍他们focus在自己身上，prioritize自己的事业（工作）并且feel good about it. 我很多时候遇到一个dilemma的时候都会想，如果我是一个男人现在会怎么想怎么做？很多时候自然就有答案了。 bellamia 发表于 2022-08-16 12:35
说得好！妈妈优先自己的事业时候会觉得guilty, 男人会feel good about it. 这个区别真的很大。
我的主旨是双圆满，不是女的混不混得上去。
男的不用生育啊。连小威都说要生二胎也得退役了，费德勒一直打着，老婆噼里啪啦生孩子一点不耽误。小威这么强壮生老大都差点死掉了。人一天就二十四小时，干得了一样干不了另一样，就算你效率再高也是有极限的嘛
女的整体上比男的靠谱 所以男的比较容易事业家庭两全呗
这么简单的事情 居然被自恨的女人用来责备那些不能事业家庭两全的女人们
没办法圆满 男的混上去了 事业成功 踢了老婆分分钟再找一个 女的是帮男人圆满了 自己啥都没有
自己的孩子自己带是牺牲？ 可把你能的 不知道的还以为孩子是隔壁老王的
成天拿生育说事的女性才是自恨。不少女性总说自己生育了牺牲了所以需要男人事业强，不能没有上进心。。。不少女性择偶的时候，男性顾家和家务能力往往是不被看重的，这不是种瓜得瓜么。
我可一点不自恨，我自小被教育的都是谁说女子不如男。我找老公找的是各方面相当的，一起进步一起操持家庭。他做饭我打扫，娃小的时候我操心多，娃大了以后他陪玩陪兴趣班。我不会一头扎进无止尽的家庭生活中，转头再抱怨不休。
大部分男人持家都不如保姆，保姆持家不如主妇。所以女人有资格挑剔保姆和男人干得不够好，因为replacement value不一样。
家里的孩子都是女人花时间精力伤害身体生的，一般带孩子也是女人带的比男人强。除了少数真正有牺牲精神在家带孩子的爸爸，大部分男人干的家务都轮不到他们离婚的时候分女人赚的财产。
男的屁股就是歪的
多点男id发言，立马都露原形了
这就是我说的心小。 心大的意思就是good enough. 很多主妇分的也不及她们的家务-婚内花销，男人就可以做到不斤斤计较。 不是所有女人都心小小气。心大大气的女人就配又家庭主男。心小小气的女人只配自己做家务。
Judy Brady著名的文章：I Want a Wife 1- I belong to that classification of people known as wives. I am A Wife. And, not altogether incidentally, I am a mother. 2- Not too long ago a male friend of mine appeared on the scene fresh from a recent divorce. He had one child, who is, of course, with his ex-wife. He is looking for another wife. As I thought about him while I was ironing one evening, it suddenly occurred to me that 1, too, would like to have a wife. Why do I want a wife? 3- I would like to go back to school so that I can become economically independent, support myself, and, if need be, support those dependent upon me. I want a wife who will work and send me to school. And while I am going to school, I want a wife to take care of my children. I want a wife to keep track of the children''s doctor and dentist appointments. And to keep track of mine, too. I want a wife to make sure my children eat properly and are kept clean. I want a wife who will wash the children''s clothes and keep them mended. I want a wife who is a good nurturant attendant to my children, who arranges for their schooling, makes sure that they have an adequate social life with their peers, takes them to the park, the zoo, etc. I want a wife who takes care of the children when they are sick, a wife who arranges to be around when the children need special care, because, of course, I cannot miss classes at school. My wife must arrange to lose time at work and not lose the job. It may mean a small cut in my wife''s income from time to time, but I guess I can tolerate that. Needless to say, my wife will arrange and pay for the care of the children while my wife is working. 4- I want a wife who will take care of my physical needs. I want a wife who will keep my house clean. A wife who will pick up after my children, a wife who will pick up after me. I want a wife who will keep my clothes clean, ironed, mended, replaced when need be, and who will see to it that my personal things are kept in their proper place so that I can find what I need the minute I need it. I want a wife who cooks the meals, a wife who is a good cook. I want a wife who will plan the menus, do the necessary grocery shopping, prepare the meals, serve them pleasantly, and then do the cleaning up while I do my studying. I want a wife who will care for me when I am sick and sympathize with my pain and loss of time from school. I want a wife to go along when our family takes a vacation so that someone can continue to care for me and my children when I need a rest and change of scene. 5- I want a wife who will not bother me with rambling complaints about a wife''s duties. But I want a wife who will listen to me when I feel the need to explain a rather difficult point I have come across in my course studies. And I want a wife who will type my papers for me when I have written them. 6- I want a wife who will take care of the details of my social life. When my wife and I are invited out by my friends, I want a wife who will take care of the baby-sitting arrangements. When I meet people at school that I like and want to entertain, I want a wife who will have the house clean, will prepare a special meal, serve it to me and my friends, and not interrupt when I talk about things that interest me and my friends. I want a wife who will have arranged that the children are fed and ready for bed before my guests arrive so that the children do not bother us. I want a wife who takes care of the needs of my guests so that they feel comfortable, who makes sure that they have an ashtray, that they are passed the hors d''oeuvres, that they are offered a second helping of the food, that their wine glasses are replenished when necessary, that their coffee is served to them as they like it. And I want a wife who knows that sometimes I need a night out by myself. 7- I want a wife who is sensitive to my sexual needs, a wife who makes love passionately and eagerly when I feel like it, a wife who makes sure that I am satisfied. And, of course, I want a wife who will not demand sexual attention when I am not in the mood for it. I want a wife who assumes the complete responsibility for birth control, because I do not want more children. I want a wife who will remain sexually faithful to me so that I do not have to clutter up my intellectual life with jealousies. And I want a wife who understands that my sexual needs may entail more than strict adherence to monogamy. I must, after all, be able to relate to people as fully as possible. 8- If, by chance, I find another person more suitable as a wife than the wife I already have, I want the liberty to replace my present wife with another one. Naturally, I will expect a fresh, new life; my wife will take the children and be solely responsible for them so that I am left free. 9- When I am through with school and have a job, I want my wife to quit working and remain at home so that my wife can more fully and completely take care of a wife''s duties. 10- My God, who wouldn''t want a wife?
主要是男权社会太久，女性思维的转变需要时间
你才知道吗，这个世界还是男权至上，对女性是不公平的。现在肯定比100年前好，但是说男女平等还是算了吧。北欧有些国家还不错的，亚洲中东这些国家都是男权父权的重灾区
当然不一样，lg挣得钱和自己挣得钱能一样吗，人家不愿意让步花你能怎么办，离了以后很多年没工作在哪里找好工资，这还不说实现人生价值，establish influence 了
哈哈。谁说不是。
这是个挺有意义的话题。
我觉得女性确实在生理上很吃亏，所以才需要家人更多的理解和支持。作为男性，承担一半以上的家务让女性有更多机会去担当社会性的责任和认可是应尽之谊。
哎呀 说到我心坎里去了 我就一直想娶个贤夫 可惜世界上不存在
的确成功，但并不代表“客户”方会认可。老板要是知道你打死也离不开这份工作会对你怎样，一个道理。和你干得好不好没什么关系。
你可能看错了杨幂了，因为大幂幂小鲜肉从来没断过，多少小鲜肉就想跟她结婚可以有好资源。杨幂这个人非常狠，绝对不会让小鲜肉得逞是真的。而且她行事风格非常男人，比如生孩子不养，离了婚一点不急着找，只想接着享受男色什么的
希望所有女生的家长教育女孩子就应该朝杨幂方向教育，永远只有最爱自己最自私的那个才能活的最好啊
即便是请保姆， 司机， 总管家的活基本上还是妈妈在操心， 除非是总管家也外包了， 这种很少。 有些部分可以分包出去， 很多操心的事情， 基本上还是妈妈在分散精力在管。 我的一个女朋友在国内是投资地产的高管， 掌管几百亿那种， 基本上是孩子完全丢给保姆，保姆做饭做家务，开车接送孩子去课外班， 外加辅导功课。 即使是这样， 她的再婚价值也远远低于挣钱连她零头都不到的前夫。 如果两个人性别互换， 这样的男人不要太抢手。
大多数家庭是请不起全职的保姆， 司机， 总管家的。 我们讨论的是普通老百姓， 你这个例子有什么意义吗？
主要是把老公当作事业来经营， 这种职业技能能提升自己在下一份事业中的价值吗？ 工作上的事业成果积累是可以提升在职场价值的， 很多技能都是portable到下家的。 维护家庭稳定的“职业技能”好像只能锁死绑定在一家。
你不给男人花钱，赚一个亿都没用。 你给男人花钱，健身教练Tony老师从北京排到西雅图等着娶2婚女人。 我真不明白，女性是真的没想明白为什么有钱男人比农民工受欢迎吗？不是他们整天钱袋子晃的叮当响，是他们真的比农民工多给女人花钱了。
说得好！妈妈优先自己的事业时候会觉得guilty, 男人会feel good about it. 这个区别真的很大。
well, 你要看什么样的再婚价值。男的舍得花钱，愿意找比自己经济条件差，事业方面差很多，甚至根本没有事业的，用钱来弥补自己的短板，容易再婚。
女的要是也愿意找比自己经济条件差很多的，事业差很多的，非常不能干的，用钱来弥补自己的短板，那再婚一样容易啊。
还有，我上学时候的白人女教授，也不是很有钱吧，就是一般的教授，55+，老公生病死了一年不到就再婚了，没觉得难啊。中国女的大概不能接受比自己经济条件差的？
这话其实没有逻辑，因为社会形成男人对家庭付出不会很多这个约定俗成出现在远远早于男人能意识到“女人离婚时候不会分钱和出赡养费给自己”这件事之前（因为这个女人得出赡养费和分钱给男人这件事是近代才成为可能的）
女的大撒币给男的这种， 双方其实都承受很大社会压力， 例如女富豪和唐僧。 需要双方都有强大内心和定力， 也是个努力的方向。 不过反之， 不会有人说什么， 反而会默认男女双方都是人生赢家， 例如墙洞和奶茶。
不不不，我就是把全部的钱都给我老公他也不愿意蹲家带娃不工作的，这是天性。大部分男人都不干的，跟女人没关系。
一般人没那么富也没那么有钱有名，谁也不认识你，只要你不介意男的事业差不赚钱，没有舆论压力。
普通有钱的男人乐意找没钱没能力没事业的女人再婚，普通有钱的女人不乐意找没钱没事业没能力的男人再婚，这就是你所谓的“再婚价值”不同。
是的， 这样想想， 我身边朋友里面也有几个是这样的， 女的都是情商很高的， 男的说是在自主创业， 一二十年也没有什么收入。 家务不了解， 貌似也没有怎么做。 外人觉得女的亏， 人家觉得不亏就行
不过社会对于女性整体是不公平的。如果不增加生育养育福利， 生育率只能整体走低， 除非是再次剥夺女性权力， 工作， 教育， 堕胎权。 已经往那个方向去了。
感觉确实像你说的，生育率越来越低了。这个貌似无解。
哪里需要几百亿了，在中国二线城市，一个月拿出来6万块，保姆，司机，厨师保证让把你伺候舒服，不喜欢可以换嘛。很多人不理解美国这样的人也不少，只是不属于这个阶层的。普通人在哪里都是当韭菜，在中国是职场累一点，在美国是生活全部要自己弄。
很多女人也不愿意啊。 你要照软饭男啊。 很多需要家庭主妇的男人找的都是软饭女啊。 你老公不愿意。你把你的钱全拿给保姆管家，心大点也有人做家务啊。你为什么一定要盯着老公做家务呢？
一方面是自己愿不愿意，但更重要的是社会喜不喜欢这种做法，老男人有钱了娶年轻老婆被社会视为天经地义，而老女人找年轻男人被社会视为离经叛道
人不能贪。像bill gates，bezos，郭台铭，李嘉诚这种层级，肯定是100%扑在工作上的人。他们的配偶，不管自身愿意不愿意，必须面对丧偶式婚姻。
哪怕没有到郭台铭，李嘉诚这种level，比如律师，医生，中上层管理者，哪个不需要至少一天12个小时工作（特殊个例不包括在内）。
有人说，我的医生很轻松。问题是等到医生能轻松工作，那非得是有一定积累和资本的时候。50+医生这种例子不在讨论范围。
女性需要平衡事业和家庭，是因为女性需要家庭。而男性从preference上来说，有更大基数是可以一心扑在事业上的。他们enjoy这种生活。
因为现代化，以及卫生设施， 女性用品的普及等等，女性越来越被解放出来，可以满足自己的“事业心”。但是任何事情都会有一个Limit。任何人，任何家庭在面对有限的资源的时候，都会面临选择和取舍。那么这个时候，一个人真正的priority取决了一切。那么相比较，女性确实更愿意选择家庭而不是“事业”。而男性正好相反。
不承认这个事实，又有什么意思呢？跟人性反着来，否定人性，不是解决问题，提高生活的办法。
极少数女性，有着强烈的事业心，要么单身，要么不要结婚成家生孩子，要么找一个能完全配合自己的老公。如果找到一个愿意配合自己的老公，就不要挑剔老公这个那个，挑剔老公原生家庭这个那个。
接受现实，知足常乐，不论是普通女性，还是女强人，都会活的开心一点。
看到主楼内容也是一下子想到ali wong这段，所以她离婚了。。哈哈。。
华人大妈听不了这个
100分
支持女性发展事业的男的就没几个
女人如果能看明白，用男人的心态去选择，也还是有希望的。 我身边有两个大厂女码工，找了其他收入差一些行业的老公，赚得应该是远不如她们自己，但是家务带娃基本一肩挑，她们本人我看都挺乐在其中。只要不在宇宙中心，单马加一个传统行业，饿不死人。
我听不理解的。 你们如果想找一个“支持女性发展事业的男的”为什么不找呢？为什么要嫁一个不支持女性发展事业的男人呢？ 你们不想一个男人“只管自己的事业就免费买一赠一”为什么要买一赠一呢？
因为人会变，而且人不能预料这些变化，也不能预料自己对变化的反应。
一个年轻的男人，会觉得支持自己爱的女人有事业天经地义；两个人应该是并肩的橡树和木棉！可是到得他发现木棉比橡树枝繁叶茂，他这棵橡树就未必能维持当时的初衷。而木棉和橡树倚偎生长了十几二十年，是挪个地方各自安好，还是继续一边抱怨一边妥协，那都不是容易的选择。
男人要找100%支持自己事业的，也需要往下找老婆。同理，女的要想自己拼事业，找挣钱不多的居家暖男就是了。不能一边要求老公全力以赴支持自己搞事业，又一边嫌弃老公挣的不及自己多。
就想说一下美女脑子好和普通长相的脑子好概率一样啊。。不觉得长相和智商有什么联系
口头支持的还是不少的 真的需要他们做家务做饭那就都不支持了
挣钱不多的男的未必支持你啊 有时候还不如和自己水平差不多的男的，起码口头支持还是有的
说白了还是穷呗，口头支持有什么用。出钱请人办事，三餐不落的提供好，就是真爱。
丑女不能太丑，起床一睁眼都吓自己。能力不错，心地不错，会考虑的。
如果男的只喜欢颜值和二两肉，那娶的绝对都是外围女了。
知道这些傻逼花瓶，心地不善，智商低，对自己和家族后代都是潜在的祸害。所以猥琐男基本上不碰这些女的。