everything in your life, regardless in China or in the US, is fair? The resource is limited, and everybody has his/her own defination of being "fair". I think you already expressed your opion/thoughts/concern to the teacher, really not too much you can do now. Do not image other teachers would be better, unless that teacher has a particularly bad reputation; otherwise, he/she is just like his/her peers.
to talk to the teacher and principle; I am not sure what next step can be. I remember my son had a situation, not quite similar to here. Some misunderstanding bt my son and his teacher (in high school). I told him "communication" is the key and encouraged him to communicate with his teacher, and eventually that teachers became one of his favorest one. Maybe LZ should encourage her kid to communicate with the teacher more frequently, friednly?
Like I replied another friend here, maybe you can encourage your kid to communicate more with his teacher, just like what we need to do when we are in trouble in our career.
many new comers have some wrong conception regarding the rules/laws/priciples here. This forum is very helpful, for everybody, regardless how long one has been here.
way to deal tough situations from native speakers here. Maybe I have not met really good ones and have not learned in the right way. In this society, one has to respect rules; if you do not like it, try to get invovled in the committee which can change it. Do not break the rule; if you are strong enough, try to change it.
娃在6年级的Orchestra,五岁开始练琴, 从去年9月份以来有三次concert,每次之前都竞技首席,有一个女孩每次都不断的beat我女儿,但每次都是最后一次那老师让那女孩做首席。其实做不做首席真的无所谓,而且学校的水平也不行,但这老师的不公平实在难以忍受,如果那女孩拉的好也没啥说的,拉的挺差的,而且娃的小提琴老师也去听过,看过concert,那娃的姿势动作根本就不行,concert中一看就知道,而且学校里有rumor,那女孩的哥哥也在那老师的orchestra做cello的first chair,是teacher's pet, 而且那女孩跟我娃讲她不想beat可她妈和哥不断force她这么做。
我和那老师沟通过用很nice的语气,那老师全是借口,没办法联系consullor和校长, 想下学期换成其它art或choir,但校长不管事,说其它班位置满了不给换,不作为,娃坚决不想上她的课了,各位请给个建议吧,谢谢!
我准备用强硬的语气再给那老师表达愤怒,那老师不是一般的过分。。
的乐团乐队什么的,水平太差。。。
的裁判有绝对的权利。
do anything if it happened to my son. I would just tell him real life is not fair. I am not sure what you want say and what goal you want to achieve.
就是让孩子在外面拿到首席,参加比赛得奖,狠狠的beat 那个女孩!
我欣赏某人说过,西方的法律和规矩,不是为了追求公平,而是追求社会管理效率和运行成本,所以个人一时的缺失,算得了什么?
我娃长笛在州中部青年交响乐团坐首席。在她的学校band跟老师的pet共享首席。开学老师把独奏乐段谱子交给pet。正式演出前三天她还达不到老师的要求。老师只好把谱子给我娃,我娃三天就让老师满意,临阵换将,我娃在正式演出吹这段独奏。从此,我娃无论坐首席还是二席,独奏都不敢让pet上。
两次荣誉乐团,我娃一次首席,一次二席,那个pet都是勉强进入,排十几席。区域长笛比赛,我娃拔头筹,她连复赛都进不去。就这样,中学三年,她都跟我娃轮坐首席。上那讲理?
校园政治比你想得更丑陋。
http://bbs.wenxuecity.com/znjy/3612532.html
unfair is "default", anywhere.
娃还安慰我。
妈妈觉得自己的孩子琴弹得不错,应该如何如何,但老师却明显不耐烦,感觉耽误时间,孩子自己的感受是亲娘搞不清楚状况,觉得很丢脸,所以记忆深刻。当然龙应台接受这样的文章做为文集的尾记,还算是有肚量,所以当偶也常常搞不清楚状况时,也会借此事安慰自己。
in the US is more fair than the ones in China? Being unfair is the "default" in society, anywhere.
而且是背对演奏者打分,只有流水号,没有名字。有一年我娃打头阵,我想亏大发了,结果我娃是首席。
everything in your life, regardless in China or in the US, is fair? The resource is limited, and everybody has his/her own defination of being "fair". I think you already expressed your opion/thoughts/concern to the teacher, really not too much you can do now. Do not image other teachers would be better, unless that teacher has a particularly bad reputation; otherwise, he/she is just like his/her peers.
愤慨各种不屑,关键那位负责老师还是个华裔! 在乐队在舞团这种事情常见,没有绝对的公平。
on paper. What can you blame? Have not you got the simlar feelings in your career? That is a good time to teach our kid a lesson.
to talk to the teacher and principle; I am not sure what next step can be. I remember my son had a situation, not quite similar to here. Some misunderstanding bt my son and his teacher (in high school). I told him "communication" is the key and encouraged him to communicate with his teacher, and eventually that teachers became one of his favorest one. Maybe LZ should encourage her kid to communicate with the teacher more frequently, friednly?
Like I replied another friend here, maybe you can encourage your kid to communicate more with his teacher, just like what we need to do when we are in trouble in our career.
Plus the teacher did everything correctly, at least on paper. Not sure how far this strategy can go.
不过,老师如果真的偏心,为啥不直接把那女孩放第一呢?
隔壁比你差的人家就录取了,因为各种功课以外的各种理由。
为了孩子在这个班上日子好过些,你还是算了。因为的确你也争不出结果来。
怎么找,怎么确定要求水准,怎么保证公平?找第三方本身就是对那老师的制裁。老师可以告学校告校长了也不一定。校长绝对不可能发这种神经的。校长是专业人士啊。不会犯这种低级错误的。
many new comers have some wrong conception regarding the rules/laws/priciples here. This forum is very helpful, for everybody, regardless how long one has been here.
way to deal tough situations from native speakers here. Maybe I have not met really good ones and have not learned in the right way. In this society, one has to respect rules; if you do not like it, try to get invovled in the committee which can change it. Do not break the rule; if you are strong enough, try to change it.
do not like it, u can quit; nobobdy begs u to attend.
是那女孩自己说的
到学校去多做义工,把学校的人事关系闹清楚了,多搞人情,脸熟了总是好办事的。别老说别人pet不pet的,关系就是人家的投资。
wishful thinking.
或者孩子有突出才能的。我和孩子都不认为这不公平。教练和那些家长earned the opportunities. 光有有才能的孩子,啦啦队运作不起来.
你看看有没有类似的因素
比如老师偏心有钱或有势或有关系的学生,你会强硬的跟老师干吗?那样会是什么结果?如果你的钱权关系等等没有另一方硬的话,估计会忍气吞声,自认倒霉吧?
我估计那个连续3次拉首席的女孩的家长对你孩子的评价可能也差不多:姿势不对,拉得不怎么样......
Good luck to ur kid.
郎朗和李云迪谁第一?
关键是你现在孩子还小,也拿不出来比赛或者外面考乐队的座次,证明不了你是对的老师是错的。
民主制度的低效率是世界/历史公认啊。独裁的效率才真的是高 -- 这里的效率不专指好的事情。
家长就要跟进;要争,而且要争到底。
要求和老师校长一起坐下来谈,不要光写邮件。谈不拢,找学区。再谈不拢,找律师。一般情况下,老师/校长看到家长这么重视这件事,会顾及的。
-- 关键是要看孩子的感受。父母在孩子需要的时候,必需力挺孩子。